Lessons In Life
by Grey girl 1989
Summary: What would happen if Ana had said No to his marriage proposal? How would things have turned out if they were broken up for a year? A Story where both Ana and Christian have to grow up a little more before they are ready for their happy ever after. Short story. Regular updates.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi Everyone.**

 **Here is my latest story. It is written to completion but it does need a bit of editing here and there but there will be regular updates.**

 **I don't pre-plan my stories. I just plonk myself in front of my laptop and see what comes out. This story took a completely different turn than what I thought it was going to be.**

 **Its only a short story. About ten or so chapters and roughly 20k words. In this story she said no to his proposal so they are not married and Teddy gate does not happen. There are a few little bits not like the first book but not much.**

 **I have 6 other stories that I am currently writing and now that this one is finished, it frees my time up for my other stuff.**

 **Thanks in advance for reading :)**

 **Also, big shout out to the girls in the FSOG Fanfic Obsessed group. It is the most amazing group of people and if you're not already a member then you should join because you're missing out. Big Time!.**

 **On with the story.**

 **Cheers GG89 xoxo**

* * *

 **ANAS POV. CHAPTER 1**

"I just want to be able to go and grab a coffee without a dozen suits following me, Christian!"

I start pacing the great room for the millionth time tonight. This argument has been going on now for almost three hours.

It all started this afternoon when I, Anastasia Rose Steele aged twenty two, dared to leave Escala alone to grab myself a coffee from the Starbucks in the corner. Before I could even place my order, Sawyer, Taylor, Prescott, Ryan, Reynolds and a very irate Christian stormed into the shop. I was unceremoniously dragged back to Esclala and I have been subjected to a retelling of the rules and regulations by my boyfriend.

Christian and I met back in May when I subbed for Kate for an interview. Ha, Subbed! That word took on a whole new meaning for me once I had been given the deluxe tour of the red room of pain.

Christian and I have had a very bumpy road over the last four months what with Ex-Subs and Bitch Trolls and Psychopathic Ex boss's and lets not for get the helicopter crash and the car chase.

No one could accuse Christian Grey of leading a boring life.

"Anastasia, we have talked and talked about this. You're my girlfriend and being so makes you a target! You can not just walk around unprotected! I won't allow you" he starts ripping at his hair for the millionth time tonight and he seems exasperated.

"Allow me? May I remind you that I am not your sub so you can not allow or not allow me to do anything! I am my own person and I am independent and If I tell you I can handle myself then you have to trust me"

He looks at me with those piercing grey eyes that I fell in love with and I just know what he is going to say next.

"Is that why you won't marry me? Because you want to be independent?"

"Christian.."

"No Ana. It's about time we sorted out your problem with becoming my wife. I have asked you, repeatedly and you have turned me down each time. At first I thought it was because we had not known each other long and all the bull shit that happened at the beginning of our relationship but now I am thinking it's me you have the problem with" he looks so hurt that I just want to wrap my arms around him but he also looks very angry so I stay in my place.

"Christian, I love you with my whole heart, you know this. I just don't see how having a piece of paper and a band of gold will change things"

"I want you to be my wife! I want to take you to parties and balls and introduce you as Mrs Grey. I want us to move to the house on the sound and live happily ever after but you don't want that. You fight me on every single little thing. I don't get you, Ana. Most women would be ecstatic that their boyfriends surprise them at work with a picnic but you get embarrassed and tell me not to do it again because you don't want people to treat you differently because you're with me. Most women would be over the moon when their boyfriends surprise them in bed with breakfast and a diamond bracelet but you throw a fit about me, the billionaire, spending money on you because you feel guilty and you make me donate the bracelet to charity. The bracelet that I spent hours designing and hand picking every stone because I thought they would shine bright like your eyes. "

God, when he says it like that it makes me sound like a bitch.

"You know I am uncomfortable with you spending money on me. And you know I want to progress at work on my own merits not because I am fucking the boss!"

"Right now you're arguing with the boss!" He hisses at me.

"You're right. I am. So before this gets any deeper I think we need to each go to our own corners. I will stay at Kate's tonight until we both cool off and then..."

"You're running. Again" He shakes his head in disgust.

"I am not running. I am going to my best friends to cool off before we say something we will regret. I'll be back tomorrow afternoon"

I walk passed him into our bedroom and pack a quick over night bag.

Normally when this happens I have Christian hovering over me begging me to stay but tonight he stays in the great room. When I walk out with my bag I find him staring at Seattle through the glass.

"I...um...I'm going to head out. I'll see you tomorrow" He doesn't turn or even acknowledge what I have said.

I get into the elevator and press the button of the garage and as the doors close, Christian finally turns and the look in his eyes devastate me.

What the fuck is wrong with me? I have a great guy and I am treating him like shit. I know most women would love the gifts and stuff but I am just terrified that one day he will wake up and realize I am not enough for him so I have been subconsciously pushing him away.

I need to fix this. I will go to Kate's to give him time to cool off and tomorrow I will tell him my theory and I vow that the next time he asks me to marry him I will say yes because the simple truth is that I love that man with everything in me.

* * *

The next day I am sitting on Kate's porch with Ethan drinking tea.

Not long after I moved in with Christian, Kate gave up the apartment and bought a small house near Pike Place market. She said she was sick and tired of hearing feet stomping above her head from other apartments at night so she decided a house would be better for her beauty sleep. Ethan moved in with her so he would be close to the university but he told me that he is here on his own mostly because Kate spends most nights at Elliott's.

"So, you gonna tell me what Grey did to you this time?"

"Ethan, it's not like that. I am the one that messed up. I have been such a bitch to christian because In my head I am worried about losing him so I am pushing him away. It's so stupid but I think I am going to have a couple of sessions with doctor Flynn because I don't think I have dealt with some issues from my childhood.

"Ana, I have seen how controlling he is with you. He doesn't leave your side at functions and heaven forbid anyone else should ask you for a dance. He just seems so obsessed with you that it worry's me"

"Ethan, I hope he is obsessed with me because I am obsessed with him. We love each other"

"Then why have you not accepted his proposal? Ana, look I am just calling it how I see it. He is your first love and I think you have just gotten too caught up in it. You never gave anyone else a chance so how do you know he is the one when you have no frame of reference?"

"No one has ever interested me before. With Christian I just fell like.."

My words are cut off when Ethan leans across and presses his lips to mine. For almost three whole seconds I am to stunned to react but then I wrench myself away from him. What the fuck!?

I stand up to put as much space between us as possible when something catches my eye.

Christian is stood at the end of Kate's garden path with a look of horror on his face. In his hands are a small bunch of wild flowers which he know are my favorite.

His eyes meet mine and I watch as hurt, anger and finally defeat cloud his eyes. His shoulder slump and he turns and walks away with out a word.

"Christian! Wait!" I run after him but I am not quick enough as he is already in his R8.

"Christian, No! Stop! That was not what it looked like!" My pleas fall on deaf ears because he turns on the engine and roars away.

He must have thrown the little bunch of wild flowers down because now they are a squashed mess from the tires.

Tears start falling fast and furious down my face and I race inside to grab my car keys only to be met by Ethan.

"Ana, I am sorry I thought.."

"Shut up Ethan! And go to hell!"

I grab my keys and jump into my car. Withing twenty minutes I am in the elevator heading towards the penthouse. As soon as the doors open I run into the great room.

"Christian?...Christian where are you?"

I go to his study but he is not there so I run to our room and breath a sigh of relief when I see him in the closet but my joy of finding him is short lived when I see him ramming my clothes into a suitcase.

"Christian.. That was not what it looked like. I can explain"

He turns to me with such rage in his eyes that I step back.

"Really? You can explain how you just happened to be kissing him?"

"I did not kiss him! He kissed me!"

"It doesn't matter. The pure and simple fact is if you would not have been so childish and ran away from your problems last night then you would not have been there with him this morning! Ana I love you but I can't do this any more"

"Do what?" My heart almost stops.

"This" He points between us "I am sick and fed up with always being the bad guy. I can't even buy you a fucking bunch of flowers with out you laying a guilt trip on me. I can't go to lunch with you because you don't want to be seen with me. I try to move our relationship forward and get married and you shoot me down every single fucking time! But most of all I am sick of seeing this look in your eyes"

"What look?"

"The look that you don't want to be here with me" He says sadly.

I am left speechless that he thinks this. I love being here with him.

"Christian, that is absurd. I love being here with you"

"If that was the truth, Anastasia you wouldn't be always looking for a fight to escape" he puffs out a breath and then sits down on the sofa with my suitcase between his legs.

"Look, Ana. I love you and I know deep down that you love me but I think we need to take a break. The fact that another man kissed you has really fucked me off but not as much as it fucked me off that you were at that house in the first place"

"Christian, I don't want to take a break. We love each other. We can work this out" I am shaking really bad because I can feel my future crumbling around me.

"Maybe I don't want to work it out. Maybe I need time to think things through. I am constantly begging you not to leave me and it should not be like that. I know I can be overbearing and controlling but its only because I don't want you to get hurt" Tears start shining in his eyes but mine are streaming.

"Please don't do this Christian. I want us to be together we can even get married if you want" I beg.

He stands up and gently cups my face. He plants a soft kiss on my lips and then stands back.

"I'll have Taylor bring the rest of your stuff over to Kate's this evening"

And with that he sweeps out the room and I fear out of my life.

What have I done?

I've lost him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi Everyone.**

 **Thank you so much for the reviews and messages I had yesterday on not only Fanfiction but on the FSoG Fanfic Obsessed Group.**

 **I had a few people message me asking if it's a HEA and if they were with other people in their year long break. I will answer your question if you ask so if you want to know just PM me.**

 **This story is a story of She messed up. He messed up. She has regrets. He has regrets. It's a story about them becoming more mature and getting over the stuff that was holding them back. Some people will love this story and some will hate it but I have loved writing it.**

 **Thanks for reading and reviewing :)**

 **Cheers GG89 xoxo**

 **TWO Months LATER. CHAPTER 2**

"Ana, you need to get up out of this bed. It's been a month and all you have done is gone to work and then wallowed in your own grief"

Kate tries for the hundredth time to get me out of my funk but I think I will be in this state for a long time.

I have not seen or spoken to Christian in two months. He won't take my calls or answer my texts. I have tried passing messages on to him through Elliott but when I ask Elliott what Christian said he just tells me he promised his brother not to talk about him to me.

I feel so so bad about my behavior. I had the worlds most perfect man and I blew it. My god, He came to my office with a surprise picnic lunch and I sent him away. He sent flowers to my office and I hid them under my desk. Why was I so against him showering me with gifts?I think I need to book an appointment with Dr Flynn.

Me and Ethan had a major blow out and I screamed at him that I hated him, I slapped him and I haven't seen him since.

The day Christian kicked me out I came back to Kate's in floods of tears. Kate was very sympathetic to me but then when I told her of the way I have treated Christian over the last few months she chewed me out. She said she may not be his biggest fan but it was clear that he was madly in love with me. She then kicked Ethan's ass out of her house because he told her that he was in love with me and he was only trying to make me see that I had options. Her reply to him was that in my heart the only option was Christian and he deserved more than the way Ethan and I had treated him. She kicked him out of her house and has been cold to him for two months but she has been my rock. She told me I was stupid to act the way I had and I know that she has spoken to Christian on several occasions to help us find a road back to each other but it's all been to no avail.

"Kate I just want to be alone"

"Well too bad. I am sick of seeing you in this state so I want you to get up, get showered and then you're coming out for a meal and then dancing with me and Elliott"

"Kate"

"No, Ana. No more excuses. Get your ass up"

* * *

Two hours later I find myself being the third wheel between Kate and Elliott. We are in a small Italian restaurant not far from Escala. I came here once with Christian but the press showed up and we had to leave.

When I am half way through my meal I feel the static that is always around me when Christian is near. I eagerly lift my head up and try to find him. This could be my chance to apologize to him and vow to change my ways. He changed so much for me and I would not budge an inch.

I look around and when I spot him I once again feel my world crumbling around me.

He's with a woman. A very beautiful woman who seems to be enchanted with him. At first I think that this must be a business associate because shes got beautiful flaming red hair that cascades down her back and I know Christian only likes brunettes but then I see him reach across the table and kiss her on the lips and I know in my heart what this is.

Christian is on a date.

He's moved on.

Seeing the distress on my face, Kate and Elliott turn around and they are both in shock at what they are seeing.

Christian and the red head are laughing and whispering to each other and when I see him lean across and kiss her softly I burst into tears and run out the restaurant before he sees me.

Sobs over take my body and I fall to my knees. It hurts so bad my lungs feel like they will explode.

I can't believe he moved on. I thought we were taking a break? Taking a break means that one day you will be off that break and back together. Taking a break does not mean that you move on with some red haired hussy! Anger over takes me and I jump up intending to storm in there and give him a piece of my mind when I am stopped by Kate.

"Ana, Ana listen to me. I am sure there is a perfectly good explanation for this"

"Are you fucking kidding me? Kate, He just kissed another woman! It's clear he has moved on I just thought he would have the fucking decency to tell me it was completely over before he started sucking face with that whore!"

"I assure you, Anastasia that Amanda is no whore" I hear from behind me.

Christian is stood next to Elliott but his little friend is nowhere to be seen.

Kate grabs Elliot's arm and drags him away from us so we have our privacy.

"Fuck you, Christian! Do you know what I have been through these last two months? Do you know how guilty I have been feeling? How it has ripped me apart not being with you? And all this time you have been canoodling with..with Amanda" I say her name with such hate that Christian chuckles.

"Jealous are you? I assume you feel the same way I felt when I saw you locking lips with Ethan. The only difference is at the time of your betrayal, we were still in a relationship. I am a free agent. I told you that we needed time apart to think about things and I recently was given a good talking too and now I understand. There is a reason you would not accept my marriage proposal, it's because you didn't love me and didn't want to be tied for life too me" He finishes off with a nod of his head like he is 100% sure that the bullshit he just spewed is correct.

"You think I don't love you?" I scream at him causing people on the street to turn and look at us "Christian, I love you more than anything on this earth! It was only my own insecurity's that got in the way of me saying yes when you asked me. I always thought in the back of my mind that you would realize one day that I was not enough for you. I told you morning, noon and night how much I love you. How can you think anything else? Who gave you this _"Good talking too"_ and told you I didn't love you?"

He shifts uncomfortably and I can see the answer on his face.

"Are you kidding me? You went to that Bitch Troll?"

"Ana, it wasn't like that. I didn't seek her out" He has a panicked look on his face like he knows hes fucked up. Which he has.

"I've told you once before that she was a hard limit for me" I angrily swipe the tears that are falling from my face.

"Baby, come home with me and we can talk about all this. Get everything out on the table and fix this. Fix us" He takes a step towards me but I step back.

"You seem to be forgetting your little date"

"Fuck her. She means nothing to me. I only agreed to this date because I knew you would be here and I wanted to make you jealous!" He stops talking when he sees the look of horror on my face.

I take a step towards him and slap his face.

"Job well done, Asshole. I'm not only jealous, I'm hurt, confused, angry and I feel like my heart has been ripped out my chest so mission accomplished!" I scream.

He holds his face where I slapped him and looks at me like the lost little boy that he is.

"I'm sorry" He looks like he is going to cry because he knows and I know that this is it.

"I'm sorry, too. I love you Christian and I probably always will but I don't want to be with someone who would purposely set out to hurt me"

"Ana, No you don't mean this!"

"But I do. Coming on the date with another woman to make me jealous I can see how your brain worked on that. But talking to Elena about me. Believing her lies when she got in your head and said I didn't love you? I wont forgive that. I told you once before that if you ever talked to that pedo bitch again that I would walk away. This is me walking away. We're over" I swipe the tears from my face and then gently wipe the tears that are now falling from his face.

"Ana, Please" He begs but I take a step back.

"Bye, Christian"

I sprint away from him as his cries for me to stop bounce off the buildings around us.

I jump in to a cab that has just pulled up and tell him to drive.

I can't believe I just left Christian but I will not tolerate someone who hangs around with a child molester. He is such a smart man in so many ways but when it comes to her he is blind.

When I get back to the apartment I quickly pack my bag. I email Jerry Roach my boss and tell him that a family emergency has come up and I need to take the holiday leave that he has been telling me I need to take for almost a year now.

I only pack a few outfits and my toiletries before I go to walk out the door. My eyes fall on the picture of Christian and I that I have on my nightstand. I debate on whether or not to take it but seeing his face everyday would only hurt me. I put the picture face down on my night stand and then walk out the door.

I scribble a quick note to Kate and then lock up the apartment. I toss my bag in the trunk of my car and then take off. I have no destination in mind I just know that I need to get away from Seattle and think.

Think about my future.

Think about how on earth I will survive without Christian Grey in my life.

But most of all I need to figure out how to mend the massive hole in my heart.


	3. ONE YEAR LATER

**Hi everyone. Bit of a time jump in this one.**

 **Next chapter will will be in Christians point of view.**

 **Thanks for the reviews, comments and messages. I had 32 inbox messages from people wanting to know if it's Hea lol**

 **On with the story.**

 **Cheers**

 **GG89 xx**

 **ANAS POV. ONE YEAR LATER.**

"Come on, Ana. Let me stay the night" Matthew resumes his kissing of my neck but I gently push him away.

"Matthew, I'm just not ready. Please give me a little more time"

"OK. I'll give you more time but Ana, we have been seeing each other for over two months. We have been on over a dozen dates but you won't go any further that making out. I'm starting to think that you're not as invested in this relationship as I am?" He looks at me with hurt shining in his brown eyes and I really want to tell him that I do like him and I am invested in this relationship but the truth is, I'm just not.

"Matthew, I like you. I do, I'm just not ready to be intimate with you. Please understand this?"

He smiles down at me and then kisses me softly.

"OK, Baby I can wait" He turns before he can see the way I cringe when he call's me Baby.

He grabs his jacket and I walk him to the door.

"I'll call you tomorrow. Good night beautiful"

"Goodnight" I kiss him once and then close the door behind him with a sigh.

I walk around my tiny one bedroom apartment and clean up the take out containers that we used. Once I am finished with my mini clean up I grab a bottle of wine, forgoing the glass and flop down on the sofa. I uncork the wine and take a big chug. I thinks it's time to admit that I am so unhappy and that I may be borderline depressed.

After the night that I walked away from Christian I went to Georgia to my mothers. I was there for two days when a friend of Bob's who just happens to work at a major PR company in New York came to visit. We got talking and I told him I worked in publishing and he said if I ever needed a job had had connections. Big connections.

Before I could even let my brain think about it I accepted his help and put in my letter of resignation to Roach.

Within two weeks, my mother and Bob had helped me gets a small one bedroom apartment in Brooklyn and the day after I moved I started my new job.

I quickly worked my way up the ladder and now a year later I am a full fledged Editor with a corner office and an assistant.

Kate was gutted when I called her and told her I was moving but she has been out to visit me a few times and we talk on the phone regularly.

For the first month after I moved to New York, Christian bombarded me with flowers, Teddy's, phone calls, texts and even letters. When I boxed everything up and sent it back to him with a "Please stop" note he got the message and I haven't heard from him since. Kate won't mention him and I have forbidden myself to Google him.

I think part of the reason I sent him back all his stuff along with a bitchy note is because of how he brushed me off in those first two months we were broken up.

I think back to that time and my heart still hurts.

* * *

 _Christian won't speak to me. He won't answer any of my texts and my emails to him have all bounced._

 _I know I fucked up. I know I hurt him but I would do anything for him to take me back. It's ironic how all those times Christian chased me and now I am the one doing the chasing._

 _It's been three weeks since he threw me out. I went to Kate's with just the suitcase he had packed for me but the next morning I found all my stuff in boxes on the porch. I cried and cried when I saw all the things he had put in those boxes. It's like he wanted no part of me anymore. He even packed the silver framed photo of the two of us on the Grace that I had on my nightstand._

 _I am so incredibly sorry and remorseful for how I have acted. I don't know whats wrong with me. I think I need professional help. No, I know I need professional help. Who in their right mind throws away a relationship with Christian Grey?_

 _I have tried several times to see Christian. I went to Escala but the codes to the_ _elevator had been changed. I went to Grey House and waited out side the main doors but I forgot that Christian never uses the main door and I watched as he drove away in his R8._

 _Today I am going to walk straight into Grey House and demand that he see me. We love each other. I am not ready to let him go. I know I have a lot of grovelling to do but I will do anything._

 _After I fluff my hair and make sure that my purple dress is perfect, I grab my keys and then head off to Grey House. Today is the day I get my man back._

 ** _TWENTY MINUTES LATER._**

 _"Let go of me you big bully!"_

 _"I am sorry Miss Steele but this is a place of business and you're causing a scene!"_

 _Lawrence continues to walk with me thrown across his shoulder until we are about one hundred feet from Grey House when he sets me down._

 _"What the hell Lawrence? You know me! It wasn't so many weeks ago that you walked in on me and Christian having sex on the piano! You know I am not some crazy lady so why the Hell did you throw me out?!"_

 _"I am sorry Miss Steele but you are no longer on the approved visitors list so when the receptionist asked you to politely leave and you called her a "Dumb Blond Cow" I had no choice but to remove you"_

 _"I just want to see, Christian" I start crying and he takes pity on me and hands me his handkerchief._

 _"I know Miss Steele but I am under orders" His voice is soft and soothing but it does nothing to help my sobs._

 _"When did he remove my name?"_

 _"I'm sorry, Miss Steele but I can't tell you that"_

 _"Can't you just help me get in? Come on, Lawrence. You know me and Christian are meant to be together. I know I made mistakes but I am here to say sorry and I will stay here all day long screaming up to the twentieth floor if I have too"_

 _"What you do on public property is your choice Miss Steele but I can tell you it will do no good. Mr Grey left this morning for a business Trip to Italy"_

 _The air is sucked out of my lungs._

 _"Italy?"_

 _"Yes. I believe he mentioned the trip to you on several occasions and asked you to go with him"_

 _He did ask me to go with him. Several times. I told him no each time because I was worried what Mr Roach would think of me taking time off to go gallivanting with the owner of the company._

 _The heavens open to match my mood and in a split second we are both drenched in rain water._

 _"I have to go. Goodbye Miss Steele" Lawrence turns to leave but stops._

 _"Ana?"_

 _"Yes?"_

 _"I'm sorry things did'tn work out with you and Mr Grey"_

 _"Me too, Lawrence, Me Too" He turns and walks back into Grey House leaving me stood on the side walk soaked to the skin. I trudge back to my car and just sit behind the steering wheel for what seemed like hours just crying my eyes out._

 _This pain in my heart is growing more and more. I miss Christian so much but him changing the codes, blocking my email and taking me off of the proscribed list speaks volumes._

 _Christian has given up on me. I am not ready to give up on him but I need to stop pestering him. Maybe a few weeks off will be best for us. When he gets back from Italy I will try again. I will do anything to get him back. I know I have made mistakes but so did he at the start of our relationship. I had to deal with Ex subs and Ex Domms. I know I have been a brat but me acting like a child is in no way the same as him running to Elena._

 _He's done it twice in our relationship. Once when we had a fight about his controlling ways and once when I admitted that I forgot to take my pill one day and he went ballistic. After he had calmed down and the pregnancy test he made me take came up negative I told him that Elena was my hard limit._

 _If push came to shove, I could handle belts, whips and canes if it's what Christian ultimately wanted. But that Pedo Bitch Troll is the one hard limit I have imposed. He cant have me and run off to her so I gave him that ultimatum and he said he chose me every single time._

 _I am confident that we will be OK because there is nothing aprt from the bitch troll that we cant come back from._

 _I leave Grey House feeling more optimistic than I have in three weeks._

 _We will be OK. He just needs time._

 _Just Time._

* * *

I think back to that day at Grey House with regrets. I should have gotten on a plane to Italy and went to his hotel. I know in my heart we would have gotten back together had I done that but I stayed away, thinking time was what he needed but with that time he went and saw Elena.

Walking away from Christian and refusing to listen to him after I left is the biggest regret in my life. I thought that distance would help heal my heart but instead it just got worse.

I miss Christian so much that I pretty much cry ever single night.

I want to call him and beg him to take me back but my pride won't allow me to do it. I know I said that Elena was a hard limit and I could not live with her in his life but nothing could be worse than this consent pain that I am always in.

The last time I called him it did not go too good. I drunk dialed him about six weeks after we broke up. I got his voicemail and could not help but let my smart mouth run away with me.

* * *

 _"Wellll Heloooo Mr Grey...hic...Um...I was supposed to talk to you, fine sir. Not your phone...Why didn't you answer? is it cus...cus...I'm such a bitch? Probably. I am a bitch...a big one. I sorry bout...about...the bracelet. S'not your fault my mind made me feel like a whore. It was weally weally sweet of you...I miss you...Miss you so fuckin much...I miss your kisses...and you cock...I weally miss that...I haven't been laid in...cant even memeber...are you getting laid? I hope not. Yous is mine Christian Grey...all mine...no one elses...you better not be with someone else...I'll fuck that bitch up...come get me and we can have sex if you're horny...I'm horny...I'm going to touch myself...thinking of you...I'm doing it now...KATE GET OUT...NO ITS NOT CHRISTIAN...NO KATE GIVE ME THE PHONE I NEEDS TO TELL HIM HOW MUCH HE TURNS ME ON..."_

* * *

Thankfully Christian was out with Elliott that night and Kate drove to the bar they were at and while Christian was in the bathroom, she deleted my voicemail after I cried and screamed at her to help me get out of the mess I and a bottle of wine had gotten me into.

I met Matthew at a publishing conference in Manhattan. He asked me out for as drink and I was particularly lonely that night so I said yes. We had dinner and drinks and then the next day he asked me to dinner and I said yes. He is a really nice guy and we have so much in common but he's not Christian.

I wish I could have my time over because there are so many things I would do differently.

When I think of the way I would react when Christian would spend money on me I cringe. Over the last year I have finally realized that money is nothing to Christian so him spending $100,000 on a bracelet for me is that same as a normal guy spending $10 on a bracelet from Walmart. Gifts always made me feel uncomfortable but then I had a reality check and a slap up the side of the head when for Valentines day Matthew got me... nothing. Nada. Not even a card. He told me that Valentines day was a holiday made by Hallmark and he doesn't buy into that consumerism.

It was a far cry from my last Valentines day with a man. Christian whisked us off to Napa Valley for three days where we stayed at a vineyard and he treated me like a princess the full time we were there.

Also I regret how I used to act when Christian would visit me at the office. At the time I was worried how people would view me because I was going out with the big boss. What an Ass I really was!

My biggest regret? Not saying Yes the first time Christian asked me to marry him. We would have been happily married now. Maybe thinking about starting a family. Instead I am in a crappy apartment on the other side of the country from everyone I love.

When my bottle of wine is completely empty I come to the drunken conclusion that its time for me to get my life back on track and that means getting Christian back.

I can not go on with out him. I refuse to make this my life. This deep seeded need to have him.

But first I need to break it off with Matthew. I never should have gone out with him in the first place. Not when my heart and soul belong to another man.

I grab my jacket, purse and keys and then make the eight block walk to Matthews apartment. I climb up the small flight of stairs and go to knock on the door when a noise from inside stops me.

Is that? Is that a head board banging against the wall? I had enough animal sex with Christian to know what that sound is. The female voice screaming at the top of her lungs _"Oh God Matthew Harder"_ is a dead give away to what they are doing.

My boyfriend is on the other side of this door having sex with another woman and I feel nothing. I am not angry or pissed off. If anything this is better for me because now I don't feel bad about breaking up with him.

I take out a pen and bit of paper from my bag and scrawl the words

 ** _"This is not working for me anymore. I hope you're happy with whoever is in there with you. Ana"_**

I leave his building and I feel like a weight has lifted from my shoulders.

This was a great start to sorting my life out. Tomorrow morning I am going to put in a transfer request to our Seattle branch.

I just hope when I do get back to Seattle that Christian is willing to hear me out and give me another chance. Its a big risk, uprooting my whole life and moving across the country without even calling Christian first but I know that if he even gave me a small inclination that he did not want me back then I would never leave New York and I would be stuck here forever.

* * *

The next morning I put in my transfer request and two days later it gets approved. I make the move to Seattle at the end of the week. I already called Kate and she said I can move back into her old house. She moved in with Elliott a few months back but kept her house because she could not bare to part with it.

I asked Kate not to tell anyone I am coming back and she promised but I have the feeling that she wanted to tell me something but she was holding it back.

Come Friday morning I am packed and on my way to JFK to catch my flight.

I am very nervous. What if Christian doesn't want me? What if he has moved on? What if he hates me? No, Christian is not like that.

I just have to bite the bullet and do this. Christian told me I needed to grow up. Well, I'm grown now. I realize my mistakes and I will apologize for my childish behavior.

It's time for me to get my life back and my life is Christian.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi Everyone**

 **Here is the next chapter. A lot of people on the FSOG Fanfic obsessed group all had a little guess about who Cassie was. Only one person guessed it right.**

 **Hope you like this...but...you may not like it.**

 **cheers**

 **GG89 X**

 **CHRISTIANS POV.**

I swear people are purposely pissing me off today!

My acquisitions team have fucked up a report on a company I have had my eye on for almost three years. My mergers team have fucked up a deal they were working on and to top it all off Andrea is sick and Olivia spilled a full mug of coffee on my crotch so I am not sat with my pants around my ankles holding an ice back to my poor scolded balls!

"Christian, do you have the...Are you knocking one out?!" Ros screeches at me as she walks straight into my office like she owns the place.

"No I am not! And for the love of God, shut the damn door!"

She shuts the door and then I explain to her about the coffee incident.

"Sucks to be you I suppose. To bad that hot piece of ass you've been tapping down in accounts is at a conference in Portland today otherwise she could have kissed it better"

"What piece of ass in accounts?" I try to look impassive but I fail miserably.

"Did you honestly think you could fuck one of the staff and it not get around the building?"

"I told her not to say anything to anyone" I sigh and throw the ice pack on my desk and then sort my pants out.

"The big boss is giving her the big kahuna. Of course she bragged to her friends. I am just shocked that you actually went there with one of the staff" She shrugs and then grabs a bottle of water from my fridge.

I sigh as I think about how things started with Cassie.

I knew her from years ago. She used to be a submissive at a club I used to go to when I was younger. I remember having a couple of scenes with her but then one night she told me she was quitting the club because she had saved enough money to put herself through college. I wished her well and gave her ten grand in cash to help her with her college books and stuff and I never really thought of her again.

That was until about two and a half months ago when I saw her walking through the lobby of Grey House. I pulled her to one side and asked what she was doing there and she told me she had been head hunted by the director of accounts and she thought it would be OK because she didn't think I would remember her after all these years.

But I did remember her. I remember what she looked like with my cock in her mouth. I remember what she looked like with whip marks on her back. I remember how she felt when I fucked her hard from behind. And then I remembered the photo I had seen of Anastasia just hours before on the arm of some douche bag called Matthew.

In my mind I thought if she could move on so could I.

I told Cassie to come to my office after hours to talk but as soon as she walked through the door in her little skirt and long legs, all my control flew out the window and I ended up fucking her hard from behind over my desk.

We agreed that it was just a one time thing. She needed to get rid of the stress of a new job and her move to a new city and I needed to work out my frustration of seeing that photo of my girl with another man.

The thing is, one night turned into a weekend and before I knew it we were screwing each other at every available chance.

We have been, I guess you could call it seeing each other for just over a couple of months now and I enjoy her company. She is sweet and kind but she has a dark edge about her. She likes to takes risks in the bedroom department. Like last week when she sent me a picture of her sat in the back seat of her car in the parking lot. Within five minutes I was balls deep giving the springs on her Mustang a good work out.

I don't love Cassie and I know she does not love me but we both enjoy each others company and enjoy the same things. It's nice when she accepts the gifts I give her, not with a scathing put down about how much money it cost like Ana used too but with a kiss and a thank you.

I am a little pissed that the whole building seems to know about us but it doesn't really matter. I am a thirty year old red blooded male and Cassie is an unattached twenty nine year old red blooded woman. We are not hurting anyone and we are enjoying each other so whats the harm?

 _The harm is you're still in love with Ana and every single time you fuck Cassie it feels like your heart is breaking and you're cheating on the woman you love!_

Well, there is that. But Ana has moved on. She sent all the stuff I sent her back with a note that said very clearly "Leave me alone" so I did. I thought she just needed me to give her some space and she would then get back in touch with me but then I saw the pictures of her with her new boyfriend and then I knew it was over.

I do miss Ana and I do still love her but she obviously did not want to be with me. She was always on edge that people would judge her for being with me. Was I that bad of a boyfriend that she was ashamed of me? Flynn seems to think that Ans's behavior stems from her child hood bouncing from home to home with her mother. If that is the case then I hope she seeks professional help to help her get over her hang ups.

"Ros, I've known Cassie for a few years. We used to mess around at the Black Lace together years ago"

Ros knows everything about me including the BDSM side of me.

"Have you gone back to BDSM?"

"Not really. We have played around a bit but I don't have the playroom anymore. I would not call the sex we have vanilla but its not BDSM either its just..."

"Really rough?"

"Yeah I guess so" I think that is a good description of what Cassie and I have "What is it that you needed when you barged in here?"

"I need the USB for Banner Publishing"

"Why? I though Sam handled everything with Banner?" I hunt around in my bottom drawer and find the USB and hold it out for her.

"She did but I thought I would take the reins on it from now on" She goes to take the stick but I pull it back.

"Why? You have too much on your plate as it is. Why have you decided to take this on?"

Ros sighs and then sits her ass back down. She looks hesitant to tell me something and I just know she is going to mention Ana because Ana works for Banner publishing. I don't think she knows that I own majority shares and have done for several years.

"Christian, Anastasia put in for a transfer to the Seattle branch. It was approved and she starts a week on Monday. With Sam going on vacation next week I didn't want you to have to deal with it. I thought it would be a conflict of interest"

Ana is moving back? My heart leaps but then I remember her douche bag boyfriend.

"Is she moving alone?" I ask as normally as I can but my voice squeaks like a fucking teenager.

"I know what you're getting at. I spoke to Kate this morning and she told me that Ana and this Matthew guy broke up"

Ros and Kate became great friends after meeting at a GEH party a few months back.

I breath a sigh of relief that Ana and the douche bag have broken up but really what does it mean? If she had wanted me she would have called or written. I tried for two months to get her to talk to me but there was only so many unanswered texts and call rejections a person can take.

"Thank you for dealing with Banner. I wish Anastasia all the best but her moving here has no baring on me" _Yeah right!_

"Christian, you were in love with that girl and I suspect you still are. You've been pining for her for a year now. She is going to be living three miles from Escala. We have some really big deals coming up and I am worried Ana will get in your head and it will mess with these deals"

"Ros, I assure you that won't be the case"

She looks at me for a minute and then nods. I hand her the USB and she leaves my office. I sit back in my chair and open the bottom drawer of my desk and pull out the small photo I have hidden in there.

Its of Ana and myself in France. I took her to Europe for two weeks for a holiday and we both said it was the best two weeks of our lives. I had rented us a boat and just after we made love in the massive bed, Ana grabbed her phone and snapped a selfie of us in our post coital bliss.

I rub my thumb over her face and then put the photo back where I found it.

I still love Ana. Deeply, love her. She is now a free agent and I am...attached? With someone? Dating? I don't know how to class what Cassie and I have but she is a great girl, she makes me happy and I enjoy her company. But she is not Ana. However, I am not throwing away what I have with Cassie just on the off chance that Ana will want to give our relationship another go. Well, maybe I will but I am not going to make it easy for Ana if she wants me back. Well, maybe I will.

I may have broken up with her first but she is the one that put the final nail in the coffin and then left for the other side of the country and started hooking up with some random man!

I love Ana but if she wants me then she is going to have to prove to me that she has changed and that she wants a grown up relationship. I have changed a lot in the last year and with Cassie's help I have learned to let loose and not be such an overbearing Ass.

I admit that part of the break up of me and Ana was my fault but she was at fault too.

I just hope that both of us are grown up enough to admit it.

I miss Ana so much. I regret how I treated her in the first two months we were broken up but I was so hurt. I started thinking about the times she would cringe if I bought her something or how she would shut me away in her office at Grey Publishing.

I know Ana loves me. Just as much as I love her and this last year has been on major cluster fuck.

I should never have gone to Elena. Well, I didn't go to her exactly. I was drowning my sorrows in a bar and she walked in. We had a drink, I told her of my troubles in my drunken stupidity and then she made a pass at me. I pushed her back and told her I never wanted to see her again.

The anger I had about Ana and then the fact that Elena told me once again that no one could love me was the reason I was so cold to Ana in those first two months.

Now that Ana is coming back to Seattle I am more than glad that Elena is out of the picture.

I brought that bitch to her knees and she is well and truly out of our lives for good.

I just hope that Ana and I can maybe sit down and talk. Maybe become friends and then move on to more.

I just hope she is OK with the fact that I have had Cassie in my life.


	5. Chapter 5

**HI EVERYONE**

 **WOW! I AM BLOWN AWAY WITH THE RESPONSE TO THIS STORY. I HAVE ENJOYED READING ALL THE REVIEWS AND COMMENTS ON HERE AND ON THE FACEBOOK GROUP.**

 **I THINK ITS DIVIDED ON WHO PEOPLE HATE MORE. ANA OR CHRISTIAN? THERE HAVE BEEN SO MANY DEBATES ON THE FACEBOOK GROUP ABOUT WHO IS MORE TO BLAME AND SO ON. I HAVE ENJOYED THAT ALL A LOT LOL!**

 **ALSO I LOVE SOME OF THE THEORY'S ON CASSIE. AND SOME OF THE COMMENTS MADE ME LAUGH. THERE WAS ONE ON THE FACEBOOK GROUP THAT SIMPLY SAID "THE WHORE HAS A NAME" :)**

 **I THINK YOU WILL AL BE SHOCKED ABOUT THE REAL DEAL WITH CASSIE.**

 **YOU FIND OUT A LITTLE MORE ABOUT HER IN THIS CHAPTER.**

 **I WONT BE ABLE TO POST OVER THE WEEKEND BECAUSE I HAVE TO TRAVLE TO A WEDDING BUT I WILL TRY TO UPDATE MONDAY OR TUESDAY.**

 **THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS, COMMENTS AND LIKES**

 **CHEERS**

 **GG89 XOXO**

* * *

 **ANAS POV.**

I have been back in Seattle for three days. I am all settled into Kate's house and I start my new job on Monday. My move went smoothly and so did my reunion with Kate. She was so happy to have me back that she cried. It was not until I saw her did I realize how much I missed her.

Today is Tuesday and as I have no food in the fridge I decide to go grocery shopping. I haven't gotten a car yet but its a nice day so I don't mind walking.

As I am strolling down the freezer isle I bump into a familiar face.

"Gail?" She turns around and seems to be in a little shock but then she walks towards me and throws her arms around me.

"Oh, Ana! It's so good to see you!"

"Thanks Gail. Its good to see you too"

"Are you just visiting or have you moved back?"

"I've moved back. Just a few days ago actually"

"That's great"

An awkward silence follows but then I address the elephant in the room.

"How's Christian?"

"Oh, he's...fine" She looks like she wants to say more but before she can a brunette woman comes around the corner holding a massive bag of chocolate raisins.

"Gail, Christian said to pick him some of these up but do you think this bag is too big?"

Who is she? Why is she calling him Christian and not Mr Grey?...Is she?...no! Please God don't let her be what I think she is.

"Oh, Hi" The brunette smiles at me and the looks to Gail for an introduction.

"Anastasia this is Casandra Wilson. Cassie this is Ana"

"Ana? As in _the_ Ana?" She asks.

"Well I am Ana. Not sure if I am _the_ Ana"

"Forgive me that was a rude thing to say"

"No problem and I suggest you stick with that bag. Christian can really knock those things back"

"Yes he can" An awkward silence ensues before Cassie excuses herself and walks away.

"Ana..." Gail starts but I hold my hand up.

"It's OK, Gail. He's a very lovable man. It's my own stupid fault to think he would not meet anyone" Tears glisten in my eyes but I refuse to let them fall.

I suddenly have an overwhelming urge to leave.

"I'll see you around, Gail" Before she can say anything I abandon my cart and leg it out the store.

When I make it home I throw myself on my bed and cry my eyes out. When my sobs stop I call Kate. She must have known. Why didn't she tell me?

 **"Hello?"**

"Kate, why didn't you tell me that Christian is with someone else?"

I hear her sigh on the phone before she answers **"Ana, I wasn't sure. I saw him with a girl a few weeks ago at a restaurant down town. They looked cosy but I did not see them kiss or anything. I didn't want to tell you in case I was wrong and you decided to not come back"**

"Well he is with someone else, Kate. I just saw her with Gail at the supermarket. I don't know how to handle this"

 **"You need to grow the fuck up, Ana! God I would love to bang your and Christians heads together. You love him. He loves you. You acted like a brat and he acted like a prick. You have both been miserable for the last year. Hang up you hang ups, sort your shit out and go get your man!"**

"Kate, I..."

 **"No Ana. Get your shit sorted and make this work. I have to go because Elliott is taking me out tonight. I love you Ana and I am always here for you but you and Christian belong together. I may not like the Jackass most of the time but he loves you. Deeply. Just have yourself a cry and then tomorrow start working on getting your man back. Fuck this Ho who ever she is. I've got your back Steele and I always will."**

"Thanks Kate. I love you"

 **"Love you too, Banana"**

I hang up and throw my phone on the bed.

It was stupid of me to think that he would not be seeing anyone. I don't think she is a sub because she was with Gail and she was calling him Christian.

My heart sinks at the meaning of all this. Cassie must be his girlfriend. He used to tell me that I was the only one he would give more too but obviously I broke his heart so he is free to date whom ever he wants.

Doesn't mean I have to like it though. I briefly wonder who this Cassie bitch is but then I feel like a bitch. She is just a girl that has captured the great Christian Grey. I used to be that girl but then I threw it all away.

After a few hours of wallowing my stomach rumbles and its then that I realize that I abandoned all my groceries at the store.

I decide to walk to the Chinese take out place on the corner. I could just order in but I want to clear my head.

I open the front door and walk out and then trip ass over head over a bag.

"What the fuck!" I gently brush off my knee that I have scraped and then stand up to see what I tripped over.

It's all the groceries I abandoned at the store. When I pick it all up I see a note in one of the bags and immediately recognize Gail's handwriting.

I open the note and start to read.

* * *

 _ **Dear Ana**_

 _ **You left so fast I noticed you left your groceries so I thought I would bring them to you. I did knock but there was no answer.**_

 _ **If you want to meet up for coffee anytime just give me a call. I have missed you and your friendship this last year.**_

 _ **Warm regards**_

 _ **Gail Taylor xox**_

* * *

Gail _Taylor!_ They got married and I missed it!

I wish I would have heard the knocking because I have missed Gail and her motherly chats. _I wonder if she has motherly chats with Cassie?_

I wonder just how serious she and Christian are? And why hasn't Kate told me about her? Unless she doesn't know about her?

I bring the food in and then make myself a quick stir fry. I make a mental note to pay Gail back and then I shoot her a quick text thanking her.

It's not until hours later when I am showered and in my PJ's trying to get to sleep does it dawn one me.

 _How the hell did Gail know where I lived?_

* * *

 **EARLIER THAT EVENING AT ESCALA. CHRISTIANS POV**

I am in my study looking at a boring spread sheet when a soft knock comes on the door.

"Come in" I look up and Gail walks in wringing her hands.

"Everything OK Gail?"

"Um, Mr Grey. I have a bit of a situation"

"What is it?" I gesture to the sofa and she sits down and I take a seat beside her.

"I was at the store with Miss Martin and I ran in to Ana"

"Ana? My Ana? I mean, Miss Steele?" My heart starts pounding at just the mention of her name.

"Yes. Your, Ana" Gail was always team Ana and Christian and I think she always will be.

"We talked and the Miss Martin came around the corner and they introduced themselves to each other and then had some small talk and when Miss Martin left, Ana seemed very distressed and she left the store without her shopping cart of food "

"Did she...Did she ask about me?"

"She asked how you were and I said Fine" At this I snort. I am far from fine but I put on a good show.

"You said she left her food? Do me a favor, go back to the store and pick up what you think she had and then take it to her. She's staying at Kate's old house"

Gail raises her eyebrow at me when I reveal that I know where Ana is currently living.

"I actually have all the stuff she left behind in my car because I was going to ask Jason to get me her address. I will drive over there now" She gets up to leave but I stop her.

"Gail? Tell her...Tell her...Never mind. Drive safely"

She nods and then leaves the room.

I pour myself a drink and slowly get lost in my memories when another knock comes on the door and then Cassie walks in.

"Hi"

"Hi. I heard you met Ana today at the store?"

She pours herself a drink and then sits Indian style in my chair.

"Yeah. Shes cute. I can see why you are so madly and deeply in love with her"

"How do you know I am madly in love with her? I've never really told you about my relationship with her"

"Christian, look around you" She gestures to the two big black and white pictures of Ana on my wall.

"This apartment is practically a shrine to that girl. Her cosmetics are still in the bathroom. Some of her clothes still in the closets. Not to mention the fact that you refuse to have sex with me in your bed or in your shower because I am pretty sure you have deemed those spaces "Ana's Space". Plus you talk in your sleep and all you say Is "I love you Ana" and then there is the Crem Da La Crem. The fact you have her named permanently inked on your skin"

"I was drunk when I had the tattoo done" Fucking Elliott and his stupid fucking "Bro's before Hoe's" lets cheer Christian up drink-a-thon!

"You know I am right which leaves me to ask this question. Where does that leave us? I know I am not your girlfriend but I do like all the crazy jungle sex so do we call this thing we have going a day? Or do we go to the spare room and have monkey sex?" She grins and I laugh.

"I do love Ana. I always have and I always will. However you are very special to me. Not in a girlfriend way but more a friend way. I don't want to lose you but I know that if I want Ana back then what we have needs to end"

"Well, Duh" She rolls her eyes and I still find that habit displeasing "I could have told you that you were in love with her after the first time we had sex"

"How?"

"Because, bird brain, It was totally kick ass awesome sex and then after when I opened the door because I forgot my cell phone you were crying into you hands like a baby"

Shes right. I did cry like a baby. Even though we were parted up I felt like I had cheated. I still feel that way every time Cassie and I are together.

"I'm sorry I couldn't be more for you, Cassie. You're a good person and I would like for us to remain friends?"

"I would like that too, however If I were Ana I would hate for my boyfriend to hang around with a girl he used to have sex with so find out how she feels about it before we commit to still being friends from here on in"

I nod my head because this sounds like a good idea.

"Oh, by the way. Now that this has ended "She pints between us "I am making a play for that fine piece of man candy, Luke Sawyer"

"Sawyer? But, He's...nothing like me?"

"Exactly. You for me were good times and great sex. Luke will be the future Mr Cassandra Martin" She grins and it makes me laugh and she stands to leave.

"Wait, before you go I have a bone to pick with you. What part of _"Don't tell anyone about us"_ and _"You have signed an NDA"_ don't you understand? Did you know all of Grey house knows about us?"

She crosses her arms over her chest and glares at me.

"And did you know that last week you got drunk with Ros and somehow managed to leave a voice mail on my office phone when you proceeded to tell me to get my ass to Escala because you wanted to fuck? And guess who just happened to walk passed my office when I played it?"

"Who?"

"Little Miss Olivia Blandino"

"That fucking bitch! Is that why she "Accidentally" spilled the coffee on me?"

"Probably. In her little dumb mind she thinks you're cheating on her with me"

"Shes fired as soon as she walks in tomorrow morning"

"I'll make sure I'm on the 20th floor to watch the show. See you tomorrow, Christian"

"See Ya, Cas"

When she leaves I lean back in my chair and look at the picture of Ana.

I could never take that down. I love looking at this picture but I would love to look at Ana herself for the rest of my life.

I pull open my bottom desk drawer and pull out the very dusty Cartier box. I blow the dust off and then open it to see the bracelet inside.

I designed and bought this bracelet for her after we had a massive argument.

I was in the bathroom and noticed that there was still a pill in Ana's contraceptive case. I went ballistic that she had forgotten her pill. I demanded that she take a pregnancy test and when it came back negative I felt such relief but then I saw the state Ana was in.

She was on her knees sobbing because of how I had shouted at her and she had a pretty big bruise coming up on her write where I had practically dragged her into the bathroom.

I tried to apologize but it just led to us arguing more because she told me she wanted a baby one day so I left Escala and for some reason I went straight to Elena. I don't know why I went to her but I think it was because I was so freaked out about maybe becoming a father and Elena always told me that I would make a horrible father so I think in my head I thought she would agree with me that I didn't over react with Ana.

She told me that there is no way I would be father material and she even encouraged me to get a vasectomy.

When I left her place that night I started walking around down town and I ended up at a park. I sat there for ages and just watched as this random man and little boy tried to fly a kite.

It took them ages but eventually they managed to get it in the air and the sound of pure joy that came from that little boy made my heart swell.

I went home to Ana and before I could tell her that one day I would like a kid she asked me where I had been to and I admitted I went and saw Elena.

Ana went off her head. She screamed and shouted at me and then told me that Elena was a hard limit for her and If I ever saw her again she would leave me and not come back.

She went to Kate's that night and came back two days later. We both apologized and then made up.

The next day I got to work designing the bracelet. I hand picked only the brightest blue and pink stones and then had a message inscribed on the inside.

When it was ready a few weeks later I made Ana breakfast in bed and had the bracelet in its box on the tray. She was excited when she saw the breakfast but when she looked at the bracelet she handed it back to me without looking and told me it was way to much money to spend on her and that I should donate it to charity.

Looking back I can see now just how bad Ana's self esteem was if she felt like a gold digger if she accepted gifts from me.

I just wish she would have read the message before she gave it back. Maybe if she would have, then we would never broken up.

I really think this proposal was the one she would have said Yes to.

I flip the bracelet over and read the message that was supposed to get me my girl forever.

 _"Anastasia, will you Marry Me? I want to get a baby started on our Honeymoon. Love Christian xoxo"_


	6. Chapter 6

**HI EVERYONE**

 **HERE IS THE NEXT CHAPTER. THANK YOU FOR ALL THE COMMENTS AND REVIEWS. I SAW THE VERY LONG DEBATE OF THE FACEBOOK GROUP. SOME OF YOU CRACK ME UP. I DID POINT OUT A FEW THINGS THE OTHER DAY ON THERE ABOUT THIS STORY SO IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT OR HAVEN'T JOINED THE GROUP THEN GO JOIN NOW. FSOG FANFIC OBSESSED.**

 **THANK YOU ALL FOR READING.**

 **CHEERS GG89 XOXO**

* * *

 **CHRISTIANS POV A FEW HOURS LATER.**

After a few hours of pacing and trying to come up with ways to contact Ana but have it seem like she is making the first move, I am coming up empty. I want her to work for it because she is the one who broke us up permanently but on the other hand I did talk to Elena knowing Ana hated her so I guess its my fault. I just need to swallow my pride and call her. Or better yet go see her.

I grab my car keys and within twenty minutes I am parked out front of Kate's old house. It's late and I don't see any lights on so she must be in bed. That doesn't stop me. I stride up the garden path and then give three sharp knocks on her door. A light comes on and then my blood boils when she just opens the door without bothering to check who it was.

She stands staring at me in her Elmo pajamas and fuzzy bed head.

 _She's still perfect. God I Love her!_

"Christian? What are you doing here?"

"Why didn't you look through the peep hole, Anastasia?"

"What?"

"I could have been a murderer or rapist and you just opened the door without checking who it was! Have you no regard for your safety?"

She squares her small shoulders and looks me dead in the eye.

"Did you come here and bang on my door at 1am for a reason? Or just to lecture me on my personal safety?" She crosses her arm and starts tapping her foot.

"I came to find out if you are in a long distance relation ship with that Matthew Douchbag?" I already know but I want to hear it from her lips.

"How did you?...Never mind. Of course Mr Stalker extraordinaire would know every little tid bit about my life. Heaven forbid I should have any privacy at all!"

"You didn't answer my question. Are you still in a relationship with that Asshole?"

"And if I am?" She tilts her chin up and I know she is gearing up for an argument.

"Stop being so stubborn and just answer the question!"

"No! I am no longer with Matthew!"

"Good!" As soon as she confirms she is free and available I swoop down and kiss her like my life depends on it. She instantly grabs onto my hair and then jumps and wraps her legs around my waist. I roughly push her against the wall and kiss like two animals until we are both breathless.

"Wow" She breaths and then kisses me softly on the lips once more.

I place her gently on the ground and then with all the strength I have, I start walking back towards my car.

"Hey! What are you doing? Where are you going?"

"Back to Escala. I made the first move so now the ball's in your court" And with that I walk out the gate and leave her gaping like a fish.

* * *

 **ANAS POV**

That stupid jerk!

I can't believe he just walked away like that after a kiss that almost made me faint!

And what the Hell is all this _"The ball is in your court, Ana"_ Crap?

What does he want me to do? Go to Escala and jump him?

 _I could go to Escala and jump him!_

No, what about that Casandra? Are they together? Have they broken up? Yeah, they must have been broken up. Christian is a lot of things but a cheater isn't one of them. There is no way he would kiss me if he was in any way still attached to Cassandra.

It's now 2am and I am wide awake. I can't get that kiss out of my mind. And, I am majorly turned on. In the two months I was dating Matthew not once did he make me feel like Christian just made me feel.

I really want to call a cab and go to Escala but then something comes to mind. What if he still gets in contact with Elena? She is my one hard limit. I know I said I would take Christian any way I could get him but I don't think I could stand him still being friends with her.

I decide to just ask him so I grab my phone. I remember his number from memory so I tap out my text.

 **Are you Still Up?**

 **Yes Anastasia. I am. How may I help you?**

Does it shock me that he knows the number is me? Not one little bit.

 **I was going to get a cab and come over and talk as the ball is in my court but I want to ask you a question first.**

It takes him almost ten minutes to reply.

 **Ask me anything.**

 **Are you still in touch with Elena? Do you still meet her? Are you friends with her?**

 **No. I have not seen her since the police dragged her out of Esclava in handcuffs.**

What? Handcuffs? My phone beeps again with another text.

 **Google her and then text me back.**

I do as he said and Google her.

My eyes bug out when I see the articles that come up.

* * *

 **Seattle Salon Owner Arrested for Tax evasion, money laundering, possession of stolen goods and possession of a narcotics with intent to sell and supply.**

* * *

The article goes on to say that she was charged and put in prison with no chance of bail as she was considered a flight risk. She pleaded guilty to everything but the drugs but because of the overwhelming evidence they had on her and she was sentenced to twenty years in prison with a possibility of parole after serving twelve years.

It says that an anonymous source gave them a tip of of drugs being in her safe.

I vaguely remember Kate telling me about one of Graces friends being arrested but I was trying to edit a manuscript and talk to her at the same time and I didn't pay any attention.

I wonder who the anonymous source was? Must have been someone close to her because how else would they know what was in her safe?

While I am pondering the fact that evil bitch troll in now locked away for two decades my door bell rings.

 _Who the hell is here at almost half two in the morning?_

I am scared shit less so I grab myself a weapon before I go to the door.

Remembering Christians anger earlier about not checking who is at the door before opening it I look through the peep hole and see Christian.

I swing the door open and look at him in shock. He's only wearing pajama pants and a sleeveless teeshirt.

"Christian? What are you doing here? In your pajamas no less?"

"When you texted me I was playing my piano. When You said you were going to get a cab I thought I would come here instead" He looks at me shyly and then rakes his hands through his already disheveled hair.

"Come in" I open the door wider and that's when he see's I have a frying pan in my hand. He arches his brow and then laughs before walking into my living room.

"Would you like a drink?"

"Sure" He shrugs and then busy's himself looking at the photos I have strewn around the room.

I makes us both a hot chocolate and then walk back into the living room where I find Christian looking at a photo of me at the top of the Empire State building.

"You look really sad on this picture. You always told me that it was your dream to go to the top of that building. Why the sad face?"

I pass him his hot chocolate and then sit with my legs under me on the armchair.

"I loved living in New York. I went to all of the major landmarks but...when I used to talk about going to New York I always pictured you beside me"

He looks at me with sad eyes and then sits down beside me.

"I'm sorry, Ana"

"What for?"

"I always promised you that I would show you the world. Instead I fucked it all up by going and seeing that old hag and you had to leave everything you knew and move to the other side of the country"

"Tell me the truth. Did you have anything to do with Elena being put in prison?"

He looks at me for a long time and I start to think that he wont answer me but then he takes a deep breath and looks me directly in the eye.

"Yes. After you left I was desperate to see you. I tried calling and texting and when you ignored it all I went down a very dark path. The day that I received the box with all the stuff I had sent you I went into a bit of a tail spin. I drank a full bottle of bourbon and then Elena called me. I answered when I was drunk and she started spewing all this stuff about how it was your fault I had turned into a weak little boy and how I needed to beat the shit out of someone. I told her to shut her filthy mouth and never say your name again and then she started to taunt me about how you were probably fucking someone in New York and how I should forget about you" He tells me sadly.

I take his hand in mine and stroke his palm and urge him to continue.

"Anger overwhelmed me and I destroyed everything. I smashed my office up and then went into the playroom and smashed that up too. I must have passed out because the next morning I woke up to John Flynn sat on the bed of the playroom just looking at me. He asked me if I was ready to get my shit together and I said yes. For almost a week I had intense therapy with him and on the 6th day I had a breakthrough. Elena abused me. It was like a truck had hit me when I realized that she had victimized me all over again. It took another week to come to terms with it and then I got angry. Really angry. I started hunting for anything I could to put her behind bars but the statue of limitations had ran out on me and I could not find any other underage boys she had sunk her claws into, thank God. I knew she always was skimming off the top from Esclava but I always turned a blind eye to it because she was the only way I could get discreet submissive's. She could go into the clubs that I could not so I let her get away with it"

He shakes his head in disgust and then takes a long sip of his drink.

"I knew that she would get a few years for tax evasion and stuff but I wanted her in for the rest of her life. I made an appointment with her one day and then I had Taylor cause a diversion. I planted the drugs in her safe and then planted some in her jacket and her desk. I had Sawyer plant some in her house and then when I knew that there was no way she would get away with it I made the call to the police. She was arrested the next day and because she put up a fight with the cops she was considered a flight risk and could not get bail. She was sentenced to twenty years in prison and given her age by the time she gets out she will be a washed up old lady. She's out of my life for good."

He finishes and then takes another sip of his drink.

"That's quite a story, Mr Grey"

"Indeed it is, Miss Steele. I knew that I had no chance with you all the time she was around so I made sure she was out of the picture for good. I was going to come to New York and tell you all about it but when I had Welch get me your up to date details I found out you were with that Matthew Dipshit" He growls the last bit and scowl's at me.

"Hey, we were broken up and I had every right to date someone"

"Did you fuck him?"

"Did you fuck, Cassie?"

He has the decency to look ashamed an then slowly nods his head. I am not surprised but it still hurts. It hurts a whole damn lot.

I stand up and start to pace the room. I hate hate hate the fact that he has been with another woman but who am I to judge? I could have slept with Matthew but I just did not feel that urge. Christian is a red blooded male who is used to having regular sex. I am surprised he hasn't had a string of women since I left. _Unless he has?_

"Have you slept with anyone other than, Cassie?"

"No. I got with her a few month ago. I am going to be honest with you and state upfront that she was not my sub but she wasn't my girlfriend either. It was more like friends with benefits. I met her years ago at a BDSM club and we had a scene together. I didn't see her for years and then I saw her walking through the Lobby at Grey House and I confronted her. She works there and thought that since it was only one scene years before, I would not recognize her"

"But you did recognize her"

"I'm not a slut, Ana. I haven't slept with so many women that I wont remember their faces"

I snort and then turn back to the window.

I feel Christian come up behind me and before I know it I am trapped up against the glass with his arms caging me in.

"I've answered all your questions now answer mine. Did you fuck him?"

"Would it change your opinion of me if I have?"

He goes silent and then see him shake his head in the reflection of the window.

"No. I won't change my opinion of you. We were broken up. We were both free to do as we please"

"Then No. I didn't sleep with him. We kissed and made out. He put his hand up my top once but that was it"

He spins me around so fast I almost trip over but he grasps me by my upper arms and looks at me with rage in his eyes but I know the rage is not directed at me.

"He touched your tits! I'll fucking kill him!"

"Calm your ass down! He touched my boob over my bra and you're this angry? You probably fucked Cassie in god knows how many ways and you're upset because someone got to second base with me? Grow the fuck up Christian!"

I push him off of me and then storm into my bedroom. I crawl into my bed and turn off my lamp. The Jackass can let himself out!

I hear all the lights click off and then I hear the front door being locked and then footsteps up the stairs.

Christian opens my bedroom door and strolls in like he owns the place. He strips to his boxers and then gets in beside me like its the most natural thing in the world.

"What the hell are you doing?" I screech at him but I refuse to turn around and look.

"I am going to sleep"

"Your bed is twenty minutes North of here. Go get in that!"

"Nope. My ass is staying right here. We still need to talk but its late. If you don't like it you can go to the guest room"

I turn around and smack him on the chest.

"This is my house you Jackass! You can't just invite yourself to sleep in my bed!"

"Why?"

"Because...Because..." _Why cant he share my bed again?_

"Because you're worried you might be tempted to jump my dick and ride me raw?" He smirks when my face reddens.

"You are so rude! I wouldn't jump your dick tonight not even if you begged me!" I turn back around and pull the covers up to my neck.

I feel him press himself up against my back and I can feel how turned on he is.

"I noticed that you said you would not jump my dick _tonight?_ Does that means that tomorrow night.." He kisses my neck and I almost, almost cave.

"It means that if the ball is in my court I don't want your balls anywhere near me tonight or any night in future. And even on the slim chance that I do have sex with you in future, you better believe that I'm gonna want to see a full STD check on you and blood work! If you are going to stay here tonight then please respect my wishes and go to your side of the bed"

He instantly moves from me and goes to his side of the bed. It's a relief and a disappointment all at once.

After both of us laying there for almost ten minutes both tossing and turning trying to get comfortable I realize why we cant get comfortable.

Every single night we have shared a bed we would sleep in one of two ways. Him wrapped around me like a vine. Or me snuggled up to his side with my hand over his heart and my leg over his thighs.

After wanting him in my bed for over a year I am not going to throw this opportunity away. And he said the balls in my court so I take charge.

I turn over and snuggle to his side. He instantly wraps his arm around me and places my hand over his heart before hitching my leg over his thighs.

"Goodnight, Christian"

"Good night, Ana"


	7. Chapter 7

**ANAS POV CHAPTER 7**

When I wake the next morning it's too the most disgusting smell known to man!

Christian is not in bed next to me but I have a damn good idea where he's is when I here him start swearing about my "Fucking incompetent toaster that can't even toast a bit of fucking bread".

I grab my robe and make my way down to the kitchen. I have to cover my mouth with my hand to stop myself from laughing my ass off.

Christian is stood in just his boxer shorts trying to make what I assume is breakfast but the whole kitchen is a disaster!

There is burnt bits of bread everywhere and what looks like scrambled eggs that are charred black.

"Why are you trying to destroy my kitchen?"

He spins around and then goes ass over head when he slips on a broken egg on the kitchen floor. I watch him land with a thud and a groan but instead of helping him I clutch my stomach and burst out laughing to the point where I have to prop myself up on the wall.

When Christian finally makes his way off the floor I laugh even more when I see that he has egg in his hair and he's having an "There's something about Mary" moment.

"When you have quite finished" he huffs and pouts but then laughs himself.

"Sorry about your kitchen. I was trying to make breakfast but as you can see, I kinda killed your kitchen"

"It's OK. Nothing a good clean up won't cure" he smiles and then walks toward me but I back up.

"Rubber gloves are under the sink. I'm going for a shower. My kitchen better be clean when I get back"

I flounce up the stairs and when I hear him tapping on his phone I shout down the stairs.

"Don't you dare call Gail, Christian Grey! You made the mess you clean it up!"

"Damn" I hear him mutter and then the sound of the sink being filled.

Half and hour later I walk into a clean but smelly kitchen. The smell of bad eggs are overpowering so I open the french door to let some fresh air in.

"How about we go to ihop?" I ask him as I waft a pillow towards the door trying to get the smell out.

"Ok. Let me go take a shower and then we will go" He picks up a small holdall bag that Taylor must have dropped off for him and then he heads up stairs towards my bathroom.

I busy myself with trying to get the smell out but when I hear the shower turn on I get an instant need between my legs and I have to physically hold onto the kitchen counter to stop myself from running up the stairs and fucking Christian to within an inch of his life.

Ten minutes later a clean and fresh shaven Christian walks into the room smelling of my Apple Cinnamon body wash.

"You smell like a girl, Grey"

"Taylor forgot my body wash and my tooth brush so I just used yours" He grins and I am taken back to a long time ago and another shared toothbrush.

I swallow hard and then grab his car keys and throw them to him.

"Let's go, hotshot"

We drive in silence to the local Ihop and then we sit in a booth and order our favorites. We sit and stare out of the window in silence before I get up the courage to break the ice.

"So...what are we doing here?"

"Ordering Pancakes?"

"You know that's not what I mean, Christian"

He reaches over and takes my hand in his.

"Ana, when you left it almost broke me. I loved...love, you so much and when I messed up and spoke to Elena and you found out and then left...those were my darkest days. Worse than my childhood and worse than those five days we were apart. I always wonder what would have been if we had stayed together. Would you have finally accepted my proposal? Would we have been married by now? Would there be kids?...but then I started thinking about all the cracks we had in our relationship. My constant need for security around you and the short leash I had you on. Your inability to commit to me and the constant worry you had that people would judge you for being with me only for my money and then I realized something. I truly believe that if we would have remained together then there would be no more us. Our problems would have become too much and we would have gone our separate ways with nothing but bad memories and hurt in our hearts. What I am basically trying to say is that our break up was the best thing to ever happen to us"

My heart falls at his words. If our breakup was the best thing to ever happen to us then where does that leave us now?

"So, you want us to be friends?"

"Yes. But with a goal of one day, down the road, becoming something more"

"More?" I smile.

"Yes, Miss Steele. More. I think we have both grown up and I think its clear from the buzz that I get when we touch that we are still hot for each other so I propose we become friends and aim for more. Before, we went too fast that we lost each other in the commotion. I want us to get to know each other. I want to go to the moives and hang out and just learn how to be a newer improved us"

"I want that too. You really have changed. Where is Mr Control Freak gone?" I smile.

"He's still in there, Ana but a good friend of mine has recently taught me that I need to let loose and have fun"

A good friend?

"What friend? Elliott?"

He shifts uncomfortably and then looks away and when he looks back I can see that he is apprehensive about something.

"No. Not, Elliott. I actually meant Cassie"

"Oh...You're friends with her?"

"Yes. She's a really nice girl and she has helped me with a lot of my shit. I actually think you would like her but she told me that you might not be receptive to her and I hanging around seeing as we have slept together"

 _Damn right I wont be receptive!_ But then if I tell him I don't want her around that might make me sound like I am worried she will steal him away.

"Well, seeing as we are now "Friends" I won't have a problem if she is around...sometimes...not all the time...but, you know. If we go clubbing with a group or something"

Christian is grinning at me like a fool.

"Your claws are showing, Anastasia"

"No they are not! Look, I am not happy that we will be hanging with someone who you have banged but I have grown up a lot and a little competition never hurt anyone"

"There is no competition. You win every time"

I smile at him just as the waitress brings our food and we both tuck in.

No words are spoken between us because for right now we are just happy to be in each others company.

* * *

After the biggest breakfast I have eaten in the last year, Christian drives me back to my house an then walks me to the door.

"Thank you for letting me stay last night. I'll call you later"

"Are you not coming in?"

"I have some work to do at home. I'll call you later and maybe we can hang out tomorrow?"

"Um, yeah. Sure. I'll talk to you later"

He nods and then walks back to his car without looking back. I go inside and lock my door and then try to figure out what just happened?

I thought he would come in and we would catch up and then...yeah, who am I kidding. I wanted to jump him and he probably sensed that and left before we had sex and it complicated our budding friendship. He did the right thing. We need to take this slow. Christian and I have broken up twice. Once during those five days and then a year ago. This is our third time and I need to make sure this is our last time. I have lived without Christian and I don't like it. He seems to be thinking the same as me so I am hopeful that this could be our happy ever after.

I spend the rest of the day cleaning the house and sorting out the last of my moving boxes. Just as I sit down with a cup of tea and a good book my phone rings with a number I don't recognizes.

"Hello?"

 **"Hi, Is this Ana?"** A very preppy voice asks.

"This is she. Who is speaking please?"

 **"It's Cassie. We met yesterday at the store? I hope you don't mind but Christian gave me your number. Well, he gave it to me after I had to call him almost 30 times for it"**

What the Fuck!

"Oh, um...yes. Hi...so...Whats up?"

 **"Well Christian told me that you two are friend who are trying for more. Seriously that man just needs to hang up his hang up and admit to the world that he can't function without you"** I can practically feel her rolling her eyes on the phone.

 **"Anyway I know he told you that we are friends and you were OK with us still hanging out but I wanted to hear it from you directly because I can only image what its going to be like. I mean, no one wants to hang with a girl who used to bang her man, Right?"**

"Um, Right. But I don't have a problem with you and Christian being friends. We were broken up and what he did in that year is none of my business just like what I did is none of his. Christian told me that you two were good friends and I'm glad he had someone to talk to and I hope we can be friends" _Total lie!_

 **"Ana, come on. You want to rip my eyes out, don't you?"** She laughs and I can't help but giggle.

"Well, yeah. I really do"

 **"And I understand that but I just want to assure you that there was nothing but sex between Christian and I. I know you probably don't want to hear this but let me give you some context. One time, he answered his phone mid fornication. Now I bet my ass that when you two make love, nothing would pull him away from you?"**

"He answered the phone? I would have slapped his face and then kicked him out of bed!"

 **"See, that is the difference between what you and Christian had and will have in comparison to what me and Christian had. It was just sex. That's it. No love. No feelings. No expectations. Nothing. Christian loves you. Deeply. Did you know he cried after the first time we were together?"**

"He did?"

 **"Yep. Bawled like a baby because to him and to his heart, he had just cheated on you. I class Christian as a great friend but I will take a step back if it means you are more comfortable"**

"No. It's OK. I appreciate you calling because now I feel better about...well, everything"

 **"Excellent. Hopefully we can all for out for a drink soon?"**

"Absolutely"

 **"Good, Well now we are friends I need your help. How well do you know that fine piece of ass Luke Sawyer?"**

And just like that, against all the odds.

I think I start to like Christians friends with ex benefits.


	8. Chapter 8

**Anas POV**

 **ONE MONTH LATER.**

As I finish putting on my lipstick, I look at my reflection to see if I look OK.

I am wearing a red bandage dress that comes to my mid thigh. A pair of really high red heels and blood red lipstick. My eyes are a smoky black which really makes my eyes pop and my hair is gun barrel straight down my back.

It's taken me almost three hours to get ready but I finally have the look I wanted. I look Sexy.

Tonight is the first night since I have been back in Seattle that we are all going out in a group.

Its going to be me, Kate, Elliott, Christian, Mia and...Cassie.

I have spoken to her a few times on the phone and we have texted but we have never met up and tonight will be the first time I am seeing her so I want to beat her in the "Who looks better" game. Its petty I know and even though she seems to be a really nice girl, she still had sex with Christian so I am on my guard.

Christian and I have hung out together lots over the last month and we have kissed a few times but nothing more than that.

He had to go to San Francisco for a week on business and tonight will be the first time I have seen him since he has been back.

I told Kate about What Cassie was to Christian and she wanted to go all mean girls on her but I told her no.

I don't blame Cassie for having sex with Christian. I mean come on, He's Christian Grey. He is every woman's dream.

Last week Cassie face timed me. It was a bit awkward to start with but after ten minutes I felt myself warming up to her because she seems like a genuinely nice person.

* * *

FLASHBACK TO THE FACETIME CALL

 _I hear my iphone ringing with and incoming face time and I am shocked to see who it is. When the call connects I am met with the face of Christians Ex Friends with benefits._

 _"Cassie?"_

 _"Hey Ana. I am bored out of my mind so I thought I would call you. Hows it hanging?" She digs a spoon into a big tub of ice cream and then moans at the flavor._

 _"Actually I am doing the same as you" I hold up my pint of Ben and Jerry's vanilla ice cream._

 _"Great minds think alike but how on earth can you eat plain old vanilla? I prefer something with a twist" She holds up her tub of chocolate caramel with strawberry's._

 _"I happen to love Vanilla. I think its the best flavor there is"_

 _She holds the spoon in her mouth and then smirks at me._

 _"Why do I get the feeling we are no longer talking about Ice cream flavors?"_

 _"Its an inside joke between Christian and I"_

 _"Oh, gotcha. Have you heard from him?"_

 _"Yeah he called me an hour ago. He has a charity ball to go to down there tonight"_

 _"I bet that will get the ladies of California drooling. That man wears a tux like no other" I don't comment because I don't know how comfortable I am on commenting on Christians hotness with a woman who has fucked him._

 _"Ana, has Christian told you how we met?" She puts her ice cream tub down and focuses all her attention on me._

 _"He told me that you were a sub at a club he went to years ago" I try not to but I scowl at her and she looks down._

 _"I want to tell you my story and maybe then you will be able to understand why Christian and I are friends"_

 _"Um, OK"_

 _"I don't have a family. I spent all my life in care. I hated it. I was in a children's home for the most of it and it always hurt me when people would come in and adopt the other kids but no one wanted the shy girl who could barely make eye contact. I loved school and did really well but not well enough to get a scholarship. As soon as I turned 18 I left the home and started working all the hours I could in half a dozen dead end jobs but the money was shit and I knew I would never be able to go to college doing what I was doing. I heard about BDSM through a friend. I went to a club and became a submissive. I hated it. I am all for a bit of kink but the canes and whips, not so much._

 _Anyway I worked there for about a year and a half and I almost had enough money to be able to go to college when one day this handsome man in his early twenty's came in. He asked if I wanted to do a scene and of course I said yes. We went to a private room and when the scene was over his phone rang and he answered it and he had some problem with an accounts mess up at one of his companies. I butted in on his call and gave him a solution for his problem and when he ended the call he asked me if I was an accountant. I told him no but I had always been interested in accounts and I was saving up to go to college. He asked me how much more money I needed and I told him $3,000 and then he gave me $10,000. He told me to go to college and live my dream instead of being someones human whipping bag._

 _I went to college and got my degree and then landed a job in a big company in Ohio. A few years later I was head hunted by GEH and when I looked the company up I realized that Christian was the guy I had scened with all those years ago. I didn't think he would remember me but I was at Grey house one day when he dragged me into a conference room and shouted at me about NDA's and stuff but when I explained what had happened he calmed down. Later that day I went up to his office and that was the first time we had sex since I came to Seattle. He cried after that first time but then it happened again. I knew he was in love with you but as far as I knew, you were gone and he just wanted a human connection, you know? Christian and I have a lot in common. We both had shitty starts but he was rescued and I wasn't._

 _I think Christian feels sorry for me because if someone would have adopted me like he was then my life would have been so much different. I still get nightmares and I am basically an insomniac. I like sex, Ana. As much as the next woman and I had this good looking guy paying me attention and I lapped it up. But, all it was, was sex. I don't love Christian. I don't even like him half the time but we are kinda like two kindred spirits. We may share a connection through that one time in the club but that is it. Yes we had sex with each other over the last few months but that's over and I am not even sad about it. I like Christian more as a friend than a fuck buddy. He gave me the chance to achieve my dreams and I will always be thankful for that. I can never repay him for how he changed my life but I know that he will be happy and whole with you so I hope you two decided to just go for this because I want to see him and you happy. I know its weird but I like you Ana. I don't have any girl friends so I am hoping we can remain friend but if you want me to take a step back then I will"_

 _She is so truthful in her words that I find myself nodding along._

 _"I understand, Cassie. I may not like the fact that Christian was with someone else when we were apart but that's life. I hold no ill will towards you and I would like to be friends. I have no problem with Christian being your friend because I trust him. I just hope I can trust you too"_

 _"Oh you can, Ana! I promise!"_

 _"Well OK then. Now, tell me. How's it going with Sawyer?"_

 _Her eyes light up at the mention of his name and we gossip for the next hour like two school girls_

* * *

I know its weird that Cassie and I have become friends kind of but I do like her. And I know I have nothing to worry about with her and Christian.

I don't have to trust Cassie because I trust Christian.

I have nit picked every single little bit of information I could about them and I have studied it with a fine tooth comb.

Cassie never touched Christian on his chest or back.

She never slept in his bed.

They never kissed or held hands in public.

He never introduced her to his family because what would he say? _"This is my fuck buddy?"_

He never showed her the house on the sound.

She never went in Charlie Tango or The Grace or his Jet.

If this would have happened at the beginning of me and Christian then I don't think I would have handled it. But I have grown up. I have matured. I have learned some harsh lessons and if I run just because Christian had sex with someone ten months after we broke up then that would mean that I haven't grown up like I thought.

A small, very small, like tiny bit of me had a sadistic laugh when Cassie made a play for Sawyer and he turned her down flat. I felt guilty for feeling like that but a small part of me could not help it. She did have my man so I think I am allowed to be a bit bitchy.

I know that Cassie and Kate have met because Elliott had a problem with his accounts so Cassie, being Christians head of accounts was dispatched to Grey Construction to help him. Kate was there and apparently Kate gave her the _"If you hurt Ana I will kick your ass speech"_ and then Cassie gave Kate the _"If you kick my ass I am going to kick yours"_ Speech. According to Elliott it was like watching two fighting birds circling each other trying to find a weakness but they were pretty evenly matched so it will be interesting how they act together tonight.

I have no problem with Cassie, however. If she thinks she can be all over Christian tonight then I am putting her on her ass!

I grab purse just as the door bell rings. I open it and my breath is almost taken away by the man in front of me.

Christian is wearing a tight bright red teeshirt that clings to him, a pair of stone washed jeans and a black leather jacket. He looks so so good!

 _If we're friends...Can't we have some benefits?_

"Ana! Wow! You look absolutely breathtaking"

"So do you. I like that color on you"

"You said you were wearing red so I thought I would match you" He grins.

"Well aren't you cute. Come on, bad boy I'm ready"

I step outside and shut the door but as I turn around I bump into Christians hard body that hasn't moved.

I look in his eyes and slowly place my hands on his chest under his jacket.

He leans down just as I lean up and our lips meet.

We have kissed before over the last month but nothing like this. We are all tongues and hands. He grabs hold of my ass with both hands and squeezes me hard.

When we pull apart he leans his forehead on mine.

"We better get going before this turns into something more" he breaths.

"There's that word again"

He laughs and then leads me to his car where he opens the door like a gentlemen and we set off for downtown Seattle.

* * *

"I just don't get how you can be friends with her, Steele! She slept with Christian" Kate slurs in my ear.

We have been at the club for hours and having a good time but now that the drinks have hit our systems Kate has gone off on a tangent about Cassie.

To be honest...I think my feelings for her have changed.

I don't know if its the alcohol or just the fact that for the first time I have seen Christian and Cassie in the same room. When she walked in and Christian greeted her with a small, brief kiss on the cheek, I saw red.

I thought I had grown up and Cassie is nice, don't get me wrong but I am not comfortable with her and Christian. At all! I wish I was mature enough to turn a blind eye to this but I just can't.

If Christian and I were back together officially, I would ask him to transfer her. But then I feel really bad because Cassie is nice. I just don't like her around my man.

 _He's not your man yet. She was the last one to have him. Go show him what he's been missing._

"I know all this Kate. God, I thought I was going to be OK with this but I am really not"

"Steele, Go tell Christian this. He has been eye fucking you all night long and I think he will do anything you ask. Just tell him to transfer the bitch to Australia and then go fuck his brains out"

"Kate, I can't ask him to do that!"

"Yes you can. If this was one of Elliott's past fuck buddies I would be ripping her hair out right now"

I look over to where Christian is talking to Elliott and Mia. Cassie is over by the bar trying once again to get Sawyers attention, who is here to drive us home, but he is just blanking her.

She has had a lot to drink tonight and I watch as she stumbles up the stairs and then takes a seat next to Kate who moves to the other side of me.

"I think Luke is gay. I gave him my best moves and he is just not interested" she pouts and then downs the remaining drink in her glass.

"Maybe he's just not that into you" Kate says nastily from my side.

"Maybe" Cassie shrugs "Plenty more fish in the sea" With that she gets up and walks over to talk to Christian and Elliott.

Christian subtly moves so there is a table between them. I know that he knows my feeling have changed and all night he has been really attentive to me and he has almost shunned Cassie.

He looks over at me and he must see my scowl because he walks over leaving Cassie with Elliott.

He sits down and then pulls me over onto his laps and puts his lips close to my ear.

"Me being friends with her wont work for you will it?"

"No. I'm sorry. I trust you completely but seeing you with her tonight, even just talking, I hate it. Is this how you felt when you saw me with Jose or Ethan?"

"Yep, every time I would get this rage inside me. That day...when I saw Ethan kiss you. That killed me. Imagine you walking in on Cassie kissing me"

I can't. The pain is to great.

I look Christian in the eyes and then hold his face in my hands.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I always fought you on security. I am sorry I didn't consider your feelings. I am sorry I was a bitch to you when you came to my office. I'm really sorry I made you give that bracelet to charity but most of all, I am sorry I ran. I'm sorry I left you. I'm sorry I said no to you all those times you asked me to marry you. If I could go back in time I would but I cant so all I can say is I'm sorry and I..."

Before I can finish what I am saying I hear an angry screech from beside me.

"What the fuck! Get your hands off my man you fucking skank!"

I look up and Cassie has her hands on Elliott's forearm. Before I can stop her, Kate stands up and marches over to Cassie and practically rips her arm off of Elliott.

"Get the fuck off of my man and back the fuck up!" Kate snarls in Cassie's face.

"I was just talking to him" Cassie rolls her eyes and it seems there's one thing that Christian and Kate have in common.

That eye roll makes Kate go ballistic.

She raises her hand and slaps Cassie so hard across the face that Cassie falls to the floor. Quick as a flash shes up again and she dives on Kate.

They are a tangled mass of nail clawing and hair pulling.

Elliott tries to part them but he gets an elbow to the nose and backs off to stem the blood.

Kate wraps her hand in Cassie's hair and pulls. Hard, causing Cassie to scream out. Cassie then punches Kate in the stomach but Kate soon recovers and flips them both over so Kate is on top where she proceeds to hit with all the strength she has.

Christian comes out of his shocked daze and gently moves me and goes over and lifts Kate from Cassie. Kate starts clawing at Christian to get him off of her but he holds firm.

"Let me go Christian so I can kill this slut bitch whore!" Kate screams but Christian keeps his grip.

Cassie gets off the floor and goes to attack Kate once again but I jump up and stand in front of Kate.

"Cassie, just go"

"What the fuck! I was only talking to him and this psycho bitch attacks me! Why do I have to be the one to go?"

"Because Kate is my family. I don't care who's fault this was. I am standing behind my friend, So please leave before this gets any uglier than what it already is"

She turns from me and looks at Christian. Does she think he will over rule me on this?

"Christian?" She looks at him but he looks furious.

"Just go, Cassie"

She looks really hurt but then grabs her clutch bag and she leaves the VIP room trying to smooth down her hair which Kate pulled out.

"Katie girl, what the fuck. She was only talking to me" Elliott takes Kate from Christians arms and Kate inspects the blood on Elliott's face.

"Did that slut hit you!?" She goes to follow Cassie but Elliott stops her.

"No Kate. You gave me the elbow to the nose. Come on, Rocky. Lets go home and soak our bruises"

They say their good byes and as I hug Kate she whispers in my ear.

"That last punch was for you, Steele"

I smile at her and then watch as she leaves.

I look around and Mia is no where to be seen. Come to think of it, she has been gone for ages.

I look over and Christian is sat with a drink in his hands staring off into space. I walk over to him and sit on his lap.

"Are you OK, Christian?"

"Yeah, I'm fine baby. That was just a shock. I didn't know Kate hated her so much"

"I think Kate picked up on the fact that I was not comfortable with Cassie so it just fueled her fire"

"I am sorry that I put you in this position, Ana. When the shoe was on the other foot I hated your friendship with Jose and you never slept with him. I should have known this would not work but I didn't want to lose my friend. I'm sorry for all those times I bitched at you about Jose and that cocksucker Ethan"

His name for Ethan makes me giggle.

"What are you going to do about Cassie?"

"Cut contact with her. I've said it before, you win every time Ana. If you are uncomfortable with her then shes gone. She was a good friend to me but you are my everything"

"But you work with her"

"I will sort something out. I promise you. First thing Monday morning"

"Thank you, Mr Grey" I kiss him sweetly and he turns and kisses me on the lips.

"Want to get out of here Miss Steele?"

He slightly moves his hips and I can feel his erection.

"Absolutely Mr Grey. Your place or mine?"

"How about our place?"

"Our place?"

"The house on the sound. It's finished"

"Then lets go" I kiss him again and we walk out of the VIP room.

Knowing how far away the house is I tell him I need the bathroom first.

Christian walks me down the VIP hallway and just as I pass a supply closet I hear a very familiar giggle.

We both stop and look at the door. Christian has a scowl on his face but when Mia and Sawyer stumble out, both with "Just fucked Hair he almost has a heart attack on the spot.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!"


	9. Chapter 9

ANAS POV

Christian is standing with his fist clenched like he wants to punch Sawyer.

I gently take his hand and it seems to calm him down a smidge.

"Christian...This isn't what it looks like" Mia starts to say but shes cut off by her furious brother.

"Not what it looks like? Because to me it looks like you and a member OF MY STAFF just had sex!"

"Well, yes we did" She blushes " But its not just a one time thing. We've been together..."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU'VE BEEN TOGETHER?"

"If you let me finish I will tell you!" Mia glares at him.

"As I was saying, Luke and I have been seeing each other for a while. And before you start about me not being able to date your staff, I looked at Luke's contract for hours and it mentions no where that this is not allowed" She gestures between her and a sheepish looking Luke.

"Sawyer, I want to fire you so bad right now but Mia is right. There is nothing in your employee contract that says this is against the rules...however...shes my baby sister and you just _defiled_ her...So.." With that he punches Sawyer straight on the jaw causing him to fall back.

"Christian!" Mia and I scream at the same time.

Mia bends down and helps Luke up and I can just tell that he wants to punch Christian back but her refrains.

"Mr Grey, I like Mia. Really like her. I would never hurt her. We have been seeing each other for a few months now. Your parents know about us. I am not going to ask your permission to date her because I don't need to. However, if it's a choice between Mia and my job then I will happily quit right now and go flip burgers at the nearest take out if it means I get to be with her" Luke is so sincere that in my head I am doing that girly clappy thing because what he said was so sweet.

Christian softens a little when he see's how Mia's face lights up at Luke's words.

He looks at me and I give him a "Put on your big boy pants and suck it up, Grey" look.

He turns to Luke and then passes him his handkerchief so Luke can wipe the blood from his lip.

"I am sorry about the punch. She is my baby sister. I know you have sisters so put yourself in my shoes. How would you have reacted?"

Luke thinks about it and then nods his head slowly. He would punch first ask questions later too.

"Your job is safe as long as whatever you have going on with my sister does not interfere with it. If you ever hurt Mia, even just a little bit, I will destroy you. You understand that, yes?"

"Yes, Sir"

"Then I wish you both well. Mia, I am sorry for my reaction but you're my baby sister. The thought of you with a man" He shudders and it makes Mia giggle.

Mia hugs him and I hear her whisper that she loves him.

Christian shakes Luke's hand and then takes mine. As we are walking away he turns back to Luke and Mia.

"I may be OK with this...just...but under no circumstances are you allowed to bring my little sister to your room at Escala, Sawyer" Christian points at him sternly.

"I promise, I wont...Anymore" He tells Christian and Mia giggles and then they disappear into the club.

Christians looks down at me and the earlier lusty hunger is now gone and in it's place is a very bummed out older brother who just found out his little sister is not so little anymore.

"Come on, Bad Boy" I take his hand and we walk out the club.

"Neither of us can drive because we both had way to much alcohol" I say looking at Christians car.

"I know. Luke was supposed to drive us home in the SUV but I guess he has other plans now" His face screws up in disgust and he pouts.

"You still look hot when you pout" I lean up and gently kiss his pouty lips.

"Lets walk back to Escala. It's a nice night and its not far"

"Lead the way, Mr Grey"

He takes off his leather jacket and puts it around me and we make our way towards Escala which I can see twinkling a few blocks away.

We walk in silence for a while and then he stops on a bench and pats the seat beside me. I sit down and he starts playing with my fingers.

"I want to say again how sorry I am that I still wanted to be friends with Cassie. That was wrong of me. I promise you I will cut all contact with her and I know that she has always wanted to work in my European office so I may ask her to transfer over to my London Office"

"Do what ever you think is necessary. I'm sorry you lost your friend" I say gently.

"Yeah. Me too. But, you're my best friend. As long as I have you then my world spins. Without you...I wont be able to handle you leaving again so please Ana. I am going to ask you this once. Is this what you want? Us? In a relationship and all that it entails? Because if we give this a shot..for the third time...and we fail...I can't see us coming back from that"

"Christian, I am ready for this. For us. We have both made mistakes. Me always running. Us arguing over security. I think you were right. If we had not broken up, I don't think we would have lasted. We have both learned some harsh lessons. I've learned that I can't run away every time it gets tough. And you, look at tonight. It was just us and a driver. No Taylor, Reynolds or Ryan shadowing us all night. You didn't go nuclear when that man asked me to dance. You just waited for me to polity tell him No. I think we have both grown up and I know that we can make this work"

He takes my face in his hands and gently kisses my lips.

"Then I am all in, Miss Steele. Are you with me?"

"I'm with you, Mr Grey"

He gives me that boyish smile and then we slowly make our way back to Escala.

When we get into the Elevator we lunge at each other.

I jump up and wrap my legs around his waist which causes my dress to bunch up around my midriff. When the doors open he walks us in and places me on the hallway table.

"God, I want you so much, Anastasia" He pants out and then he starts to undo his belt.

Out of nowhere, a vision of Cassie assaults my mind.

Did he have her on this table? In the elevator?

It's like a bucket of cold water on my libido.

"Christian, Christian wait. Wait" I push him off of me and he backs up confused.

"Whats wrong?"

"I just...I...Can't" I hang my head and then stand up and right my dress.

"What do you mean? Whats wrong?" He looks confused, hurt and scared that I am saying No to a relationship with him.

I wrap my arms around my chest and will the tears that are threatening to fall away.

"I just...I can't be with you..here...in the apartment"

"Why?" He looks around confused.

"As soon as you started to unbuckle your belt I got a vision of Cassie. Did you have her here, on this table? Have you had her in the kitchen? The library?"

"Ana, Baby. Forget about her." He walks over and wraps his arms around me.

"I just can't be with you where I know you have had her"

"But, I had 14 submissive in this apartment and its never bothered you before"

"I know. But they came before me. I can't get mad at you for something that you did before I came into the picture...but she came after. After me"

He looks down at me and I see understanding come to his eyes.

"I understand. But I want to reassure you. She was never in my bed or your library"

"But you had her in other parts of this place didn't you?"

He looks down ashamed and then slowly nods his head.

"I can't...I just can't"

"I understand. I do, really. If the tables were reversed then I would not want to be anywhere near where that dipshit touched your tits"

"Tit. It was only one" I smirk and he looks down mad but I can see the smile on his lips.

"Come on. Lets get a drink and then I will take you home if you're not comfortable here"

"I want to stay the night. I just don't want to have sex here"

"Ever?" I can see the panic in his face.

"I don't know"

He takes my hand and then leads me to his sofa. He pours ups both a glass of wine and then comes and sits next to me.

"Tomorrow morning, I will call Elliott and have him gut this place. I will have the whole apartment re arranged so that even the rooms are moved around. Would that help you?"

"Yes, I think it would. But you don't have to do that. We can just stay at mine"

"Or we could both stay at ours?"

"What do you mean?"

"Ana, we have been apart for a year. That's a lot of time to lose. I know we went to fast before but the one thing I never regretted was having you live with me. I love waking up in the morning with you. I love hearing about your day. I used to love those little post It Notes you would leave for me to find. I know that we have to take this slow and get to know each other again but I am a man that knows what he wants and I want you. I want you to be my girlfriend again and I want us to move into the house on the sound"

"Christian...That's the opposite if going slow. That's taking a major step in our relationship"

"I know but I miss you Anastasia. I miss you so much and if this place is a hard limit for you then I will gut it or sell it but I don't want to move into that house, our house, without you"

What else can I say. This man is pouring his heart out to me. He wants me and I want him. Yes it's fast but It's us.

"Okay"

"Okay? You will move in with me?"

"Yes Mr Grey, I will"

"Thank Fuck!" He swoops down and lifts me into the air spinning me around and around.

"I love you, Anastasia. I always have and I always will"

"I love you too, Christian"

He leads me into the bedroom and then hands me some sleep shorts and one of his teeshirts.

He strips off to his boxers and then we get into bed and snuggle.

"I know you wont make love to me here but by this time tomorrow, we will be in the House and then all bets are off. Deal?"

"Deal" I lean over and kiss him on the lips before drifting into the most peaceful sleep I have had in over a year.

* * *

 **ANAS POV. The Next Day.**

"I can't believe you stole this from me? Do you know how long I have been looking for this?" Christian looks pissed as he holds up his Harvard sweatshirt that he just found in one of my drawers.

"It smelled of you and it helped me sleep when we were apart" I give him Bambi eyes and his face softens.

"I suppose its no different from me sleeping with your panties under my pillow" He shrugs and then throw the sweatshirt into my suitcase.

"Ewww! You slept with my panties under your pillow? I hope they were clean ones?" He just shrugs and continues to throw stuff in my case.

"Don't be so shy, Ana. It's not like you've never seen me sniff your underwear before. We have done all manner of things to each other. An old bit of underwear should not bother you"

"What did you do with them? Were they like a comforter like the sweatshirt was for me?"

He barks out a laugh and then tips my entire drawers of socks into the case. He hasn't folded any of it.

"Hardly. I would run them through my fingers, have a little sniff and then imagine that you were riding my cock as I jacked off" He shrugs like this is normal and then goes back to ripping my room apart.

"That's...well, it's kinda hot but so perverted at the same time, Christian" I can't keep the laughter out of my voice.

"Come on, Miss Steele. Don't tell me you didn't flick your bean on all those cold lonely New York nights with out me" He says over his shoulder with a wolfish smile.

"Well, I wouldn't call all my nights lonely. After all I did invest in this" I open my bedside drawer and pull out the vibrator I bought a few months after moving to New York.

As soon as Christian see's it he turns a little pale.

"You got a vibrator?"

"Yep. It really helped me...De-stress" I smirk but he looks pissed.

He stomps across the room and grabs the trash bag we have been using for all the stuff I want to throw out and holds it open.

"Throw is away. You have me now so you don't need a bit of plastic"

He moves to take it from me but I pull it back.

"I am not throwing this away, Christian. I happen to like it and I will continue to use it on the nights when you are not available"

"I will always be available. Now throw it away"

"No. I tried to jump you when we walked in here and you turned me down. I'm horny and if you wont fuck me then you better believe I'm fucking myself!"

"Oh, trust me, I'm going to fuck you. I'm going to fuck you into next week but I am going to do it in our bed in our House, not some bed that Katherine Kavanugh probably had my brother bent over giving it to him in the ASS!" He hisses and when I get the visual of Kate butt fucking Elliott I lean over and laugh my ass off.

Before long, Christian and I are side by side on the bed trying to catch our breath because we laughed so much.

"I have had many many sex conversations with Kate and not once has she mentioned that your brother likes a good butt fucking"

"I know. I said that in the heat of the moment. I have no idea why. I just want our first time back together to be special"

I reach over and link my pinky finger with his.

"It will be special. It will be special because its us"

He smiles and then plays with my hair but now I have a burning question.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure" He moves so he is on his side with his hand under his head.

"You said last night that you destroyed the playroom? Where did you and Cassie...?"

"In one of the guest rooms. Never in my bedroom or bathroom. Occasionally in my office at Grey house. Once in the car and sometimes at her place. I've already emailed Andrea and I have told her I am moving to the office which is next to mine. It's the same size and its only being used as a conference room."

It hurts to hear but at least he is honest with me.

"Okay" I am happy that she didn't get in his bed. That place is mine. No one else.

"No may I ask you something?"

"Sure" I move so I am mirroring how he is laying.

"Why didn't you sleep with that Matthew guy? I saw a picture of him and he was not a bad looking bastard and you did date him for a while. Don't get me wrong, I am glad you didn't. It would not have changed the way I feel about you even if you had slept with him. I'm just curious"

I know I am blushing. This is difficult to talk about but he was honest with me so I will be honest with him.

"I'm not going to lie to you. I did try to sleep with Matthew. It was after our third date and we were kissing on my sofa. I was enjoying the kiss but then I realized that my panties were bone dry. Not even a drop. When Me and you kiss or hold hands or have any type of contact, I get wet. With him...Nothing happened. I knew in the back of my head that I was not really into him so I just started to make excuses. I am thankful that I didn't sleep with him. The day I went to break up with him, he was fucking some woman in his apartment"

"He was cheating on you? What an asshole!"

"I like this new communication thing we have" I smile over at him and then he kisses me.

"Me too, Baby. Now lets get this stuff packed up so we can get home and I can fuck your brains out" He rolls over me and in one swift move he grabs my vibrator and throws it in the trash bag.

"You wont be needing that when you have all this" He grabs his junk, winks at me and then walks out the room.

God I have missed that man.


	10. Chapter 10

**HI EVERYONE.**

 **SORRY THIS IS LATE. I HAD A MAJOR COMPUTER MALFUNCTION AND LOST MY ORIGINAL CHAPTER 10 AND THE EPILOGUE SO I HAD TO RE WRITE THEM AND ANY AUTHOR WILL TELL YOU THAT IS SUCKS WRITING A CHAPTER TWICE.**

 **THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER OF THIS STORY. I HAVE LOVED WRITING IN AND I HAVE LOVED THE REVIEWS AND THE DEBATES ON THE FACEBOOK PAGE LOL.**

 **THANK YOU ALL FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS STORY.**

 **I WILL BE BACK SOON AS I HAVE ANOTHER STORY I AM WRITING WHICH IS 100% FLUFF AND THEN I HAVE ANOTHER STORY WHICH IS MOSTLY ANGST.**

 **SEE YOU ALL SOON.**

 **CHEERS**

 **GG89 XOXOX**

* * *

 **ANAS POV**

Within a few hours of getting to Kate's house, I am packed up, boxed up and on my way to the house on the sound.

This is going super fast but...I want Christian.

We should already be in the house. We should be married. If our insecurity's hadn't of gotten the best of us then this is where we would be so moving in with him is a no brainer.

We are stronger together. When Christian and I were good, we were very good. But when we were bad, we were very bad.

This year apart has done us the world of good. We have both matured and both learned some harsh lessons.

I think the biggest lesson that we have learned is that Yes, we can live apart from each other. We can get on with our daily lives and go to work and function like the seven billion other people on the planet.

Yes, we can live without the other, but it's not really living.

It's like when your street has a black out. You get up and you tentatively find your way in the dark. You know where everything is and you can manage for a while. But when the lights come back on and you can see the world again, that's what Love is.

I love Christian and I know he loves me. Yes we both made mistakes but we have learned from it. Dealt with it. And now we move on.

Whats the point in living in the past?

I am going to embrace this time with Christian. We are working on our More. Moving into the house is a big step but its an inevitable step.

It's like Christian said. We have failed twice. This is the third time and if we can't make it work this time...then that's it.

That's why we are going to put our all into this. We will succeed. I know we will.

"We're here, Baby" I am stirred from my musings by Christian.

I completely zoned out and it's only now that I see the House.

It's even more beautiful than I remember.

When Christian first showed me this place it was a bit of a shambles. The out side was a murky brown color and the plaster was peeling everywhere. Now it's painted a nice creamy gold color and it has flowers all around the bottom of it springing up from the flower beds.

Christian gets out the car and then comes and opens my door. He helps me out and then we both stand wrapped around each other as we stare upon our house. Christian told me on the drive over that the house is in both our names.

Normally I would have protested about me not contributing to it's cost but Instead I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek and said thank you.

"Are you ready to go inside?" Christian asks me.

"Lead the way, Mr Grey"

He takes my hand and then walks us up to the double doors. He opens it and when we step in I gasp.

The inside is completely renovated. It has double sweeping staircases that lead to a very big balcony that looks over not only the foyer but also the family room which I can see from where I am too.

It's absolutely breath taking.

"Do you want a tour?" Christian takes my hand but I stand firm in my spot.

"You can give me a tour later. Right now, all I want to see is our bedroom"

He looks a bit shocked but then lust clouds his eyes.

He scoops down and picks me up bridal style and then runs as fast as is safe up the stairs to our waiting bedroom.

* * *

I lay across Christians chest trying to get my breath back.

The love making that we have indulged in this afternoon is like nothing we have ever shared before.

At first we were both a little nervous but as soon as we were both naked its like instinct over took us.

We took the first time slow and my hands re explored the territory that is now and has always been mine. Christians chest. I planted little kisses all over it and when he was deep inside me I ran my nails down his back and that's when we both found our release.

We made love three times and it's like we could not get enough of each other.

"I've missed this. Missed you, so much" I say and then kiss another of his scars.

"I've missed you more than words can say, Anastasia. I love you so much and I know that this last year was hard on both of us but this, right here, what we now have? It was all worth it"

"I agree. I feel...I don't know...more grown up? I finally feel like we are in a grown up relationship. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, It does. It feels...real this time"

I lay myself flat over the top of him and he gently cups my ass in his hands.

"Want to know something, Mr Grey?"

"Always, Miss Steele"

"I missed you. I missed making love to you. I missed fucking you but do you know what I missed most of all and what I have fantasized about this last year?"

"Whats that?"

"The back rubs you always give me after a long sex sessions" I giggle and then he flips me over so I am on my stomach and then he proceeds to give me what I have been dreaming of this last year.

When he is finished, he gently kisses my spine and then whispers in my ear.

"My turn now" He flips himself off of me and lays on his stomach and I sit on the back of his thighs but what I see makes me scream and laugh at the same time.

"CHRISTIAN! You have a tattoo of my name on your ass!"

He turns to look at me shyly.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot that was there"

"How long have you had this?"

I trace my fingers over the bold Italian script. Its of a Grey colored Rose and written up the stem is my name, Anastasia.

"I've had it for about eights months. Do you get the meaning?" He asks me as I explore it a bit more.

"Yes. Anastasia and then a Steele Rose. Anastasia Rose Steele. It's beautiful"

He rolls over so I am sat on his thighs and then he pulls me forward so I am once again laying in him.

"I was really down one night and Elliott decided that we needed a Bro's before Ho's night. He basically took me out and got me plastered. I woke up the next morning with a bandage on my ass and when I peeled it off I saw the tattoo. I was shocked because I had always been anti-tattoo but it's so beautiful that I kept it. That same night Elliott got a tattoo but instead of having Kate's name he had Yosemite-Sam tattooed on his pelvis" He chuckles.

"That's is such and Elliott thing to do"

"It is. Now, not that I don't like you sitting in me naked but I am starving so why don't we go down stairs and order Chinese food and then come back up here for round two?"

"Sounds like a plan but I want my round two now, then we can eat, then we come back up here for round three which is technically round six" I start kissing up his chest and before long we are indulging in another round.

* * *

 **CHRISTIANS POV. MONDAY MORNING.**

The weekend was the best I've ever had. When Ana agreed to move into our house with me I was ecstatic.

I love Ana. Deeply. She's it for me and even though I was with Cassie for a few months, she doesn't hold a patch to Ana.

When Ana and I have sex, even if it is a rough Fuck, it's always making love. Having that connection with another human is brilliant.

This morning, waking up with Ana and then making love to her in our bed and then the shower was outstanding.

We had breakfast together and because I had to go to work before her, she saw me off at the front door with a kiss and a slap on the ass and a "Have a good day, dear". She kissed me so good that it want until I was in the parking garage of Grey House did I realize I forgot my briefcase.

As I walk into Grey House I have a spring in my step. I even say good morning to the overly flirtatious blond on reception.

However my mood takes a downer when I walk into my office and find Cassie waiting for me.

"Morning, Mr Grey"

"Cassie, what are you doing here? We don't have a meeting scheduled"

"No we don't but I came to give you this" She hands me a letter and when I read it my eyes dart to her.

"Your letter of resignation?"

"A few months back I was offered the position of Department head at Amazon. They head hunted me and I turned them down. After what happened over the weekend I know that our friendship must come to an end so I called them up and asked if the job was still going and they said yes. I start three weeks from today"

"About what happened on Saturday night..."

"It's OK, Christian. It was a misunderstanding on Kate's part. I was not flirting with Elliott in any way, shape or form. You're my friend...you're my only friend and now that Ana is back there is no room for me in your life which I understand. It's time for me to move on and maybe make some new friends. Hopefully fall in love and one day have a family" she tells me sadly.

"You're a great girl, Cassie. Any man that you fall in love with will be very lucky. You've been a good friend to me and m sorry that it had to end this way"

"Yeah, me too. I just hope that Ana knows what a good guy you are and I hope she doesn't mess up again"

"I Have no intention of messing up again but if I do I know Christian and I will be able to work it out. Together" Ana says from the door way.

When I turn to look at her I see she has my briefcase with her.

"Ana, I was just telling Christian goodbye" Cassie tells her.

"I know. I heard most of it from the door. Good luck at Amazon" Ana tells her not unkindly but rather sternly and then she holds the door open for her.

Cassie turns to me and I can see that she wants to either hug me or shake my hand goodbye but she does neither.

"Good bye, Mr Grey"

"Goodbye, Miss Martin and Good luck"

With a small wave and a sad smile, she walks out the door and out of my life.

Ana shuts the door behind her and then walks over to me.

"She was in here when I came in. I didn't..."

She stops me with a finger to my lips.

"I know. I trust you"

She leans up and kisses me gently on the lips.

"I brought you your briefcase. You left it in the table in the foyer at home"

"Home. I like the way you say that" I pull her close to me and then kiss her deeply.

"I have to go. Have a great day at work, Mr Grey"

"You too, Miss Steele. I'll see you at home later"

"Yes, you will. Later's Baby"

She winks at me and then walks out of my office.

God, I love that girl!

* * *

 **ANAS POV**

I get back to the house before Christian and I decide to cook for him tonight.

I walk into the kitchen and have a quick chat to Gail and then tell her to take the rest of the day off.

I start preparing a couple of steaks for us and then I throw in some roast potatoes and some vegetables.

I love cooking and I have missed cooking for Christian. He is so appreciative of anything on his plate and it makes my heart hurt to image that little scared four year old boy who had no food.

While everything is cooking I make my way up to our room and put on some leggings and Christians Harvard sweater. I make my way back down the stairs and when I pass his office I see the boxes that are stacked in there waiting to be put away.

We packed most of our stuff away on Saturday but we still have his office and a few small things in a few of the spare room.

I decide to help him by packing away his stuff. If I put it in the wrong place then he can just change it around later.

I start by putting all his business books on his shelf. I put them in volume order and then place a few of his nic naks like his awards between the books.

I open another box and start putting his stationary in his desk but when I open his bottom drawer I find a lone box.

 _I recognize that box!_

With trembling hands I pick the box up and open it.

Tears instantly fill my eyes when I see the bracelet nestled in the velvet.

It's such a beautiful bracelet but I remember the morning he gave it to me.

It was after a major fight we had. I had forgotten one of my pills and he basically dragged me into the bathroom and made me take a pregnancy test. I know he didn't mean too, but he bruised my wrist pretty badly and when he gave me the bracelet, in my mind it was like a _"I'm sorry I marked you, here's something pretty to cover it with"_

I remember giving it back to him without even really looking at the bracelet and telling him to donate it to charity.

He kept this the whole time?

I take it out the box and examine it. It really is very pretty. Little rows of blue and pink diamonds nestled into white diamonds.

I flip it over and the words that stare back at me steal the breath from my lungs.

 _"Anastasia, will you Marry Me? I want to get a baby started on our honeymoon. Love Christian xoxo"_

He asked me to marry him and have a baby? He told me that he never wanted kids. It was always a big fight between us because every time I would bring up the subject of kids he would blow me off.

Not that I wanted Kids back then but in my future I always wanted to be a mother and Christian was adamant that he didn't want to be a father. That was one of the reasons why I never said yes to his marriage proposals.

It always felt like a deal breaker. If we had gotten married and had to watch all my friends have kids and become mothers, would I have resented Christian? Probably.

But now, looking at this inscription, he changed his mind about kids?

I hear the front door opening so I quickly but the bracelet back where I found it and then run out of the room.

I see Christian putting his briefcase down by the door and as he turns I run and jump into his arms and kiss him all over his face.

"Wow! What a welcome home!"

"I love you, Christian Grey" I whisper into his neck

He pulls back a bit and looks into my eyes.

"Ana, have you been crying? Your eyes are all red?"

"Yeah I had a little tear but I am a girl in love with a beautiful man living in a house fit for a queen. I am allowed to become a bit emotional"

"You are a Queen. My Queen"

"And you're my King"

I kiss him softly and then we make our way into the kitchen where we share a fabulous meal and talk about our days.

Cassie's name does not get mentioned once and I know that she never will be again.

During the meal and late into the night when our bodies are both exhausted from our love making, the bracelet pops into my head and gives me and idea.

I smile while I look down at my sleeping king. I have made mistakes just like he has, but I have something in mind that will prove to him once and for all that I am committed to him.

I fall asleep thinking of my plan and dreaming about our future.

* * *

 **TWO MONTHS LATER. CHRISTIANS POV**

I hate being away from Ana.

Ros was supposed to come to the New York office to oversee a new merger but she gave me some bullshit excuse so I had to come instead.

I have only been away from Ana for a day but I miss her like crazy.

These last two months have been the best of my life.

Ana and I are in a routine which I love.

We wake up, make love and then have breakfast together. We ride to Grey House which is where we both now work because I merged banner publishing with Grey Publishing and it's now housed on the 18th floor so I get to see my girl during the day.

We have lunch together when our schedules permit it and then we ride home together after work. When we get home we have our dinner and then spend the next few hours just hanging out with each other and then we make love or fuck long into the night.

On weekends I dismiss Jason and just have the coverts watching us which Ana loves. I know she used to feel suffocated with always having someone in the car with us or attached to our hips so this way we are safe an can just be us without the third wheel.

We make the most out our weekend and we go sailing and gliding. Sometimes we go hiking or for picnics. We sometimes go dancing and a few times we have been to the local bowling ally where we both had way to many margaritas which left us with major hangovers but it was really fun.

I miss my girl so bad that I pull out my phone and ring her but it goes to voicemail. I know she has a big meeting today and tomorrow, that's why she could not come with me so I leave her an _"I love you and miss you voicemail"_ and then get on with my day.

Later that night I am putting on my tuxedo for some gala that Andrea called me about today that I simply must attend but she forgot to mention before now when my phone rings with Ros flashing on the screen.

"Grey?"

 **"Christian, I just spoke to Micheal McGregor and he said that you forgot to sign one of the papers for the merger?"**

"What? No I didn't! What is he talking about?"

 **"I'm not sure but he said he is going to the same Gala tonight so he will bring the contract and his lawyer and you can sign. It's no big deal"**

"Ok. I am positive I signed all those pages. I don't fuck up like that Ros and you know I don't"

 **"Christian, we are all human. It's just one page. You will both be in the same place tonight so it's no biggy"**

"Ok. Night ros"

 **"Night Boss"**

I have never forgotten to sign a page before. Never. Something is fishy about this so I will make sure Taylor is on his guard tonight.

* * *

"Andrea didn't say that the gala was at the Empire State building"

"Must have slipped her mind, Sir" Taylor shrugs and we both get into the elevator.

"Why did you just push for the observation deck, Taylor?"

"Ros texted me and said that Mr McGregor thought you would have more privacy on the deck instead of at the Gala. He is waiting for you up there now with his lawyer"

"Something is not right about this, Taylor. This to me screams "Throw the billionaire off the building"

"I will stay with you, Sir"

Why is he so calm?

When the doors open to the observation deck I know something is wrong. The place is covered in rose petals and candles. I step out the elevator and when I turn around to talk to Taylor I see the doors closing and he just smirks at me as he is carried back down the building.

I walk around slowly because I am still not sure what this is but my heart stops when I see my very own brunette goddess, wearing my favorite plum dress, looking out over the glittering city.

She must sense me because she turns and gives me a dazzling smile.

"Hello, Mr Grey. Glad you could join me"

"Ana, what's going on?"

What is all this?

She smiles at me and then makes her way over to me.

She gives me a quick kiss on the lips and then she does something that I never thought she would do.

She gets down on one knee in front of me. She takes a big breath and then looks up into my eyes.

"Christian, I have loved you from the very first moment I met you. When I lived in this city without you, I was like half a person. I only existed but I was never really living. Moving back to Seattle was the best thing I ever did. Not because Seattle was my home, because any city in the world that has you by my side is my home. I know you asked me this question and I never said Yes but, Christian, we are two very different people now. We have both grown and learned from the past and I am confident that we will grow old together. If you say No, then that is OK but this is my promise to you. I promise to love you, cherish you and be your partner in good times and bad. What we have at the moment is enough and it will be until the end of time...But...I would love to tell people I am married to the worlds most perfect man. I would love to be your wife and the mother of your kids. With or without a Yes, I would love to have your babies one day. I know we wont always have smooth sailing or blue sky's but as long as we are together I know we can weather anything...so...Christian Grey, Master of my heart, King of my castle, my soulmate...will you do me the privilege of becoming my husband. Will you Marry me?"

She looks up at me with such love and devotion in her eyes that there is only one thing I can say.

"Yes. Yes I will marry you" She squeals and then jumps into my arms where I spin her around.

"I love you soon to be Mrs Grey"

"I love you too, Mr Grey. I have something for you"

She walks over to a small table and picks up a box that I recognize.

It's the box that holds that bracelet.

"I found this in your office a few months ago. I am sorry that I never looked at it and I am sorry I told you to give it away. I made a few adjustments to it that I hope you're OK with...but...well, here"

She hands it to me and I open it.

The rows of pink and blue stones are now rearranged and they spell out the word "Yes".

"I know I can never take back all those No's but I hope you know that I love you and if I had a time machine I would have said yes to you that first time you asked"

"Ana, this is perfect. What you just did. What we now are, We are perfect. I love how our story unfolded. And I am glad that I finally get to put this on you"

I take her wrist and place the bracelet on.

"It looks lovely on you. But the engagement ring I am going to buy you after this gala will look even better"

"Christian, there is no Gala. Andrea, Taylor and Ros were all in on this and helped you get here. We have the rest of the night to ourselves so we can do anything you want"

"Anything I want?"

"Anything"

An idea pops into my head but I am not sure if she will go for it. There's only one way to find out.

I get on one knee in front of her and she giggles.

"Anastasia, you asked me to marry you and I accept but now I have a proposal of my own. Marry me...tonight. Lets get on the Jet and fly to Vegas. I want to wake up tomorrow morning as your husband. What do you say?"

She walks forward and bends a bit to kiss me.

"I say call Steven and get the Jet ready"

"As you wish Mrs Grey"

* * *

 **MINI EPILOGUE**

Eight hours later I married Anastasia Steele in the Little Chapel of Love. It was just the two of us and we planned to have a party when we got back to Seattle.

Over the years we grew as a couple and then as parents.

I once wrote on a bracelet that I wanted to get her pregnant on our honey moon and that's what happened. While we were sunning it up in Barbados we made love multiple times and one of those times resulted in our little boy.

Theodore Raymond Grey was born nine months after we were married. He was joined a couple of years later by his Sister Phoebe Grace and a few years after that we welcomed our twins, John-James Grey and Abigail-Amelia Grey.

We had our arguments over the years but we never went to bed angry and I think we have a very healthy marriage.

Kate and Elliott had a little girl but her birth hurt Kate so much she swore, never again.

Mia and Luke Married after a year of dating. The went on to have six kids and moved into a house I gifted them which is just down the street from us.

I never saw Cassie after that day in my office but I did hear through the grapevine that she got married a few years after leaving GEH and now had a few kids and lived in Ohio.

Elena Lincoln was released from prison after serving 12 years. She walked out the prison with only a few dollars and a few clothes. After being out of touch for over a decade she forgot some basic life lessons. Like looking both ways when crossing the street. She was hit by a speeding truck and that was that.

As the years went by my love for Ana only grew. She truly is the other half of me.

Sometimes the Lessons in life that you learn are not the ones that can be taught.

Sometimes the lessons in life are the ones you already knew but needed a bit of tweaking.

And sometimes The lessons in life are simple.

If you have a roof over your head, Food on your Table and Loved ones in your life you are truly very blessed so you should teach others the lessons you learned in order for them to become as blessed as you.

There is no point dwelling on the what if's or the could have, would have, should have's.

I am so thankful that Ana and I found our way back to each other.

Our road may have been rocky at the start but ever since we said "I Do" we have had plain sailing and blue sky's.

 **THE END**


End file.
